


Pointe

by BATdesu



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ballet, Ballerina!Ciel, Crossdressing, Fluff and Angst, Lies, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Other, SebaCiel - Freeform, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-02-28 04:50:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 25,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13264053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BATdesu/pseuds/BATdesu
Summary: Up until he'd seenherdance, Sebastian Michaelis had been indifferent to the timeless art of ballet. But now that he had, he simply couldn’t getheroff his mind. A love story about stepping up, falling into step and taking a step at a time.





	1. Chapter 1

The wet towel was cool against his face as Sebastian cleaned the sweat from his jog at the community center. He had just started a new job that was up the street a few blocks so working out after his shift became a daily thing. Exercise had proven to be a rewarding way to spend his afternoons; it allowed him to free his mind and work out his frustrations before heading home for the evening. 

On his way toward the locker room he spotted a familiar face. A tall and muscular man was running on one of many treadmills facing a window. Sebastian slowed his walk, carefully sneaking up to the man's side and swept the safety clip out of the machine, bringing the belt to a stop within seconds.

Grey eyes widened momentarily and then spotted the smirking face next to them. “Did you need something Sebastian?” he asked in a false friendly tone. 

Sebastian chuckled and returned the overly sweet voice. “Just wondering what you’re still doing here, Agni? Aren’t you seeing Sohma this afternoon?” 

Agni only smiled. “I am, however the plans have been moved to this evening. Thank you, _secretary_ , for keeping track of my daily plans. I knew I hired you for a reason.” He rolled his eyes.

“Just didn’t want you to look bad in the eyes of your beloved!” Sebastian called over his shoulder while walking away. 

“It’s not that serious!” Agni shouted back with red cheeks. 

Sebastian only replied with a chuckle and headed into the men’s locker room to shower and get ready to head back home. As he was leaving, he passed Agni again, put a hand on his shoulder and wished him good luck on his date, for which the other man thanked him. They parted ways and Sebastian headed out of the glass doors of the gym and into the open lobby of the community center. The air conditioned room was refreshing and quiet compared to the noise of the gym, and had a faint smell of cleaning sprays. He waved a friendly goodbye to the young man that worked at the front desk, who smiled and waved in return. 

As he headed toward the exit thirteen young girls in leotards suddenly began to funnel out of the dance studio, heading toward their own locker room. He stepped to the side to let them all pass and glanced into the classroom window. There was one remaining girl in the room who was talking to the rather loudly dressed instructor. He found this woman’s appearance to be amusing as she clearly wanted to be noticed. Her bright red hair was pulled up into a top bun and she wore matching red glasses with a sparkling silver chain, a red leotard, black tights and red ballet shoes. Her gaze shifted to him and he realized he had been staring. With a flirtatious wink she waved and he immediately began awkwardly speed walking from the building.

“ _She probably thinks I’m into her now! Nice job!_ ” he chastised himself silently as he strode up the street to where his car was parked. Just as he was unlocking it a young boy in a navy blue hoodie ran by, nearly colliding with him.

“Pardon me, sorry!” the boy called over his shoulder, though it didn’t slow him down. He continued running in the opposite direction from the community center. 

“No worries...” Sebastian began to call back, but the boy was probably out of earshot at that point.

***

Sebastian was greeted by his welcome wagon of cats the moment he stepped through his door. He put his keys on the nearby hook and knelt down to give each of them a little attention. “That explains why you guys are so needy...” he said to them as he made his way to the kitchen and spotted their empty dishes. They of course urgently followed him as if they had never eaten a meal in their lives. He smiled and sarcastically apologized for starving them and commented on what a difficult life they must lead being indoor cats.

After feeding them, he began to prepare his own dinner. Cooking was something Sebastian considered himself to be pretty good at but since he lived all alone (aside from his cats), he didn’t keep his fridge well stocked. “Something simple it is then.”

Sebastian ate slowly at his dining room table, equipped with four chairs though only one ever really saw any action. Occasionally he would have a guest or two over (Agni and Sohma usually), and they would play cards or chat at the table. Tonight, he spent most of his meal continuously setting his needy cats on the ground to keep them away from his food. Each time they jumped up on the table he would sigh and set them gently on the floor where the others continued to beg. They knew how to get what they wanted, which was proven when weak-willed Sebastian tossed each of them a small piece of cheese off his plate. He couldn’t deny his babies.

***

Sebastian found his new job to be stressful and highly demanding; the company he worked for manufactured security systems and distributed them to stores across the country. Sebastian was on a small team of employees whose responsibilities were to handle the accounts of the distributors and since there were so many of them they had a lot of work to do every single day. While he didn’t know them very well yet, his co-workers seemed nice. The three of them had all been working there much longer than Sebastian, but he picked up on the job quickly and was every bit as productive as they were.

Bard was a rugged man who looked to be very uncomfortable in the necktie and slacks he had to wear. He was confident, though a complainer, tended to be defensive if proven wrong and only drank black coffee, “the way men drink it!” he’d made sure to point out. 

Finian sat in the desk across from Sebastian and did his work happily without complaint. He seemed to just be thankful to have the job at all and always tried to look on the bright side of a situation, countering Bard’s whining. Sebastian wasn’t sure how Meyrin was so good at her work when she managed to trip over, bump into or drop everything in the building. She wore thick round glasses that he was convinced needed replacing. It also seemed as though she had somewhat of an interest in Sebastian. Even while sitting with his back to her desk, he could feel her staring at him and it gave him chills. 

“Oi, Sebastian! The three of us are gonna get lunch at the cafe across the street. You wanna come with?” Bard asked from across the room. 

A smile grew on Sebastian’s lips as he turned to his colleague and replied, “Sure. Now?”

“Yeah! They always bake new pastries around one o’clock!” Finny chimed in. 

Sebastian began to follow the other two men out of the office into the hall when he paused and turned his attention to Meyrin who sat with her face mere inches from the computer monitor she worked at. “Aren’t you coming too, Meyrin?” 

Her face flushed immediately and she quickly turned her head towards the three of them. “Ah! Yes!” she said loudly, “I’m coming!” Hastily she stood from her desk. All it took was one step before she tripped over her own foot and stumbled several feet and right into Sebastian who caught her before she fell. Whether or not this was an accident Sebastian couldn’t be so sure, but he gave her a knowing look and helped her stand up straight. “Are you alright?”

“Y-Yes! Sorry! I’m such a clutz, yes I am!” she stammered. In the elevator to the first floor, Finny giggled and teased her about needing a helmet before going outside. Sebastian and Bard struggled to stifle their laughter. 

_Perk_ atory Cafe was in a relatively old but charming building made of bricks and intricate moldings. Apartments were stacked on top of the quaint establishment making it fit right in with the other buildings it was sandwiched in between. The scent of fresh bread could be smelled from outside and was even better inside. There were glass cases full of muffins, cinnamon rolls, fruit filled pastries and some things Sebastian had never tried before. Small round tables were scattered around the dining room with a significant amount of patrons seated at them.

Bard ordered a black coffee and an enormous warm sandwich that mostly consisted of different kinds of meats. Meyrin followed and purchased a croissant with cheese. Sebastian wondered if he should have ordered before Finny, as he proceeded to order more pastries than he could carry. Deciding to keep it simple, Sebastian ordered a black coffee (although he would have preferred something sweeter, he didn’t want to hear what Bard had to say) and a strawberry filled pastry. The group luckily found a table near a window where they could all sit together. While eating they chatted about non-work-related topics at Finny’s insistence. 

“What kinds of things do you like to do Sebastian?” Finny asked when the topic found its way toward day-off-hobbies. 

“I’m not all that interesting.” Sebastian explained, “Just normal stuff. I go to the gym, play cards with my friends, stay home with my cats…” Meyrin perked up at the mention of his pets and squealed asking if he had any photos of them. Sebastian found some on his cell phone and shared them with her, while she swooned and whined about how sweet they were. 

“The gym huh, how much do you bench?” Bard asked while leaning back in his seat and sipping his coffee attempting to appear aloof but listening closely and subconsciously comparing himself to Sebastian. 

“Uh, I guess around two hundred.” Sebastian replied while struggling to think back to the last time he actually did any deadlifting. Bard was silent while mentally trying to convince himself it didn’t make him less of a man if he lifted pounds less than Sebastian. 

Changing the subject, Bard looked at his watch and stood from the table, “Lunch is almost over. We should get back.”

Finny snickered, the abrupt topic change was not lost on him nor Sebastian. The four of them cleared their table and walked back across the street to their work building. 

With food in their stomachs, the rest of the day seemed to fly by. It wasn’t until Finny cheered “Finally! Three o'clock!” while standing from his seat and stretching his arms over his head that Sebastian had noticed it was time to leave. 

Bard had already packed up his desk ten minutes early as he eagerly awaited quitting time and headed straight for the door as soon as he heard Finny. “See you tomorrow!” Bard called from the hallway, not bothering to stop walking. 

Sebastian was typically the last one to leave their office. He didn’t have a bus to catch, anyone to go home to, or any appointments waiting on him so he took his time shutting down his computer and leaving for the gym. 

Sebastian jogged all the way there, walked inside and proudly scanned his membership card to grant himself access into the gym. After changing into sweats he decided to warm up on the treadmill for ten minutes, and then did some stretches. Once he was loosened up, he moved on to the machines to lift some weights. He picked one, sat on the bench seat and set the weight amount. With his arms up in “L” position against the leather pads of the machine he pulled his arms closer together to lift the weight and let them move apart to release it. He did this a few times before he slowed down when his eyes focused on the dance studio across from the gym. He could see the brightly dressed dance instructor again, directing the class of young girls as they stretched their legs up on a bar mounted to the wall. He watched for a few minutes while the girls each took turns spinning from one end of the room to the other, their teacher clapping with what Sebastian assumed was the counts of the music. 

Just before he decided he should continue lifting weights, a skinny girl with grey-blue hair took her turn spinning across the room. There was something different about the way this girl moved. She had firm arms that she held out in front of her making a disconnected hoop and delicately danced on just the tips of her toes. From where Sebastian sat he couldn’t see many details about the girls expression but he could practically feel her passion in her gentle and fluid movements. When she reached the other end of the room, some of her tightly bunned hair had come loose. She shyly tucked it back behind her ear and found her place at the end of the line behind her classmates. The exercise continued with the students taking turns performing dance steps. Sebastian found himself holding his breath as he waited for her turn. When it arrived, he took his arms off the machine pads and leaned forward on his knees, fully fixated on this girl’s pure talent. The way her body bent in half and back up with such strength and yet looked as if it took no effort at all. He could only imagine how strong these girls must be to have that kind of bodily control and began to respect dance as more than just an art form.

***

That night at home, while laying across the sofa with a fluffy grey cat in his lap, he mindlessly stared at the television, though not paying any attention. The cat purred and slept soundly so he knew he was stuck. The show he was watching had long since ended but here he stayed, trapped in his adorable fluffy prison. A loud buzz startled the cat awake and she took off in a panic. The cause of the buzz was a text message from Agni on Sebastian’s cell phone on the coffee table. With a sigh at his pet’s dramatic reaction, he sat up and checked the message on the screen. There was a selfie taken by Agni of himself and Sohma at a restaurant with a table full of delicious food. Agni knew Sebastian was a sucker for cuisine. The text only read, ‘Jealous?’

A devious grin crossed Sebastian’s face as he typed his reply. ‘Of your dinner….or your boyfriend?’ Sent. He waited a few moments before receiving a response of just Agni’s middle finger. He laughed and marked himself an imaginary point in their game.

***

The next morning Sebastian woke up before his alarm clock. He checked the time and rolled back over in bed, coming face to face with another of his beloved cats. He pet its ears gently and closed his eyes, hoping for a few extra Z’s.

By the time his alarm did go off, he felt so much worse than before. Going back to sleep was a bad idea. His movements were sluggish and labored until he got a cup of coffee in him (the way he liked it. With cream and sugar!). Rain could be heard tapping against the windows of his living room to which he sighed and grabbed his umbrella before heading off to work. 

The day seemed to drag on. Fridays always did. Bard spent most of the day complaining about the weather and how it would ruin his weekend plans, while Meyrin commented that she likes to listen to the rain from inside her apartment while reading. Sebastian wondered if she read books the same way she looked at the computer screen. 

Lunch time was spent inside the building since the rain caused Bard so much annoyance. The group ordered out and took their break once the food was delivered. 

“Any weekend plans, Sebastian?” Finny asked out of the blue. 

“No, probably just going to go volunteer at the animal shelter.”

“That’s so sweet!” Meyrin gushed, which she did at near about everything Sebastian did. It was starting to creep him out a bit but he could tell she was harmless. 

Once he finished eating, Sebastian went straight back to work. He was running slightly behind due to correcting many mistakes Bard had been making all day. Several fields in the spreadsheets were left blank and it was obvious Bard was cutting corners to get his job done quicker; it was something Sebastian didn’t feel like calling him out on due to the inevitable backlash he would hear for the rest of the day. It was easier to just fix it himself. The rest of the afternoon dragged on and ended about the same as every day. Bard left first in a hurry, followed by Finny. Meyrin always seemed to linger before taking her leave and then Sebastian would finally head out. 

The rain had stopped for now so Sebastian was able to jog over to the gym without his umbrella. His routine had become habit by now. He almost didn’t even think while he stretched and then took his seat on the bench of what turned out to be the same machine as yesterday. He set the weights and began his reps when he caught a glimpse of that flamboyant dance instructor. She was like a stop sign, hard to miss. The sight of her reminded him of the girl he saw yesterday and how elegantly she moved. As if on cue, she came into view stretching her leg up and back down. The sight of her actually gave his stomach a small flutter. He ignored it for now but couldn't tear his eyes away once she started dancing. Satin toes tapped delicately against the hardwood floor while thin arms raised up and down. When she shifted her weight from one toe to the other her skirt flared around her hips in a flourish. It was then that Sebastian realized that she wasn’t the only girl dancing. The whole class moved in unison with her, however not as elegantly, in his opinion. When they spun he focused his eyes on her expressions. When they turned he made note of the muscle tone in her shoulders. The routine came to an end when all of the girls were seated with their arms and legs stretched out on the floor in front of them, heads pointed down. Miss Red-Head Instructor clapped wildly, obviously happy with the job they had done. Her body language was a stark contrast to their dancing just moments before. 

When the class appeared to be ending, Sebastian looked to his own surroundings checking to see if anyone had seen him watching the girls rather than working out. He awkwardly began lifting weights again in hopes his little ‘break’ wasn’t too obvious. Once his arms began to tire he decided to call it a day and headed to the showers. While bathing, his mind wandered and landed on delicate ankles and wrists. A soft yet serious expression that harbored more emotion than he’d ever experienced in real life. He stood beneath the shower head daydreaming until somebody else entered the showers. He finished quickly and dried off.

***

At Agni’s insistence, Sebastian went out with him and Sohma that night to have some drinks. Being the third wheel wasn’t his idea of a good time, but he supposed someone should be the designated driver. It might as well be him. They went to bars rarely but when they did it was to a club in the downtown area. The lighting inside was low and the music they played was always just a bit too loud but Sohma enjoyed it so of course Agni did too. Sebastian was happy for them despite Agni’s attempts to hide any real relationship he and Sohma had. You don’t take your ‘friend’ out on dates. Sebastian wasn’t stupid.

From where he leaned against the bar, he could see Sohma and Agni dancing awkwardly within the crowd. They were surrounded by quite of number of girls wearing more makeup than was appropriate and even less clothes. Sebastian sipped his soda, eyeing the mob of intoxicated dancers and focused on how sloppy everyone looked. Their bodies bobbed ungracefully and swayed loosely against each other, bumping shoulders and hips with strangers. He couldn’t help but think about the ballet class and how much more enjoyable watching them dance had been. It was a difference between fine cuisine and fast food. Watching this mess made him feel embarrassed on their behalves. 

Before his friends became too drunk, he decided to cut them off and not so forcefully drag them out to the parking lot. Sohma happily stumbled toward the car, leaning against it with his whole body. The words he was saying were difficult to understand but Sebastian thought he could make out “dancing” and “sticky”. He decided against clarifying the true nature of the sentence and helped his drunk friends into the vehicle safely. After making sure they were buckled up in the back, he took his place in the driver’s seat and drove his passengers to Agni’s house. By the time they arrived, the two of them were fast asleep leaning against each other. Sebastian struggled to wake Agni who apologized and unsuccessfully attempted to wake Sohma up. Sebastian opened the front door while Agni carried his ‘not-boyfriend’ inside. He bid his friend _good night_ with a tired smile, and turned to head back home.

***

Saturday was adoption discount day at the animal shelter. Sebastian gathered up two of his cats in their own carriers and apologized to each of them with a pile of treats. “I know, I know it’s not fun,” he said sympathetically, hoping his tone might comfort them. “But I’m only your foster home. I know someone will adopt you today though. I’m sure of it.” When he had agreed to take care of them, he knew that he would have to give them up, but it didn’t make the goodbyes any easier. It never did.

When the three of them arrived at the shelter, he brought the two pet carriers in with him and placed them on the ground near the adoption cages. 

“Look! Our friends are back!--Says Jasper” a voice came from behind Sebastian. He stood and faced the man behind him who held a pair of black and white cats. Sebastian gave them pets under the chin with a smile.

“Yeah, they’re here. Ready to go. Is there anything I can help with, Snake?” A fitting name for an animal shelter employee although they didn’t see many reptiles there. 

“Granny Mabel is still in her cage--Says Onyx”, Snake replied for the cats in his arms. 

The bizarre speech quirk that Snake adopted was something Sebastian had become used to by now. He nodded and walked into the ‘cat room’ of the shelter and spotted Granny Mabel perched on a bed within her cage. He smiled apologetically at her, “Sorry Granny. Another adoption day. Maybe today will be the day?” He said as he unlatched her cage and picked her up gently. She was an old tabby cat with mangled whiskers and patchy fur. One of her fangs poked out of her mouth in a jagged way that made her less than cute to the eye of passers-by. He carried her out into the main lobby and carefully set her in her temporary cage. Loud meowing echoed throughout the room and made Sebastian feel terribly guilty for not being able to take them all home with him. 

“I hate these kids...So Loud--Says Granny Mabel” Snake said. 

When people arrived to view the cats for adoption, Sebastian did most of the talking. It was hard to get anything done with Snake only speaking on behalf of the cats. “Bring me home!--Says Caitlin” 

By the end of the afternoon most of the cats had been adopted including the two Sebastian had brought with him. He had to give the two of them a more personal goodbye than the rest but the family taking them home seemed like a great fit and he was at least relieved they would still be together. 

When it came time to close up and take the remaining cats back, Sebastian regrettably carried Granny Mabel back to her cage in the ‘cat room’,”Maybe next Saturday, Old lady.”

***

On Sundays, Sebastian usually stayed around the house cleaning up his mess from the week and doing laundry. He started his day by making coffee and eating toast before getting dressed. His parade of cats followed him from room to room as he did this and that. Of course he took frequent breaks to snuggle them and play with them, occasionally snapping photos of them with his phone and texting them to Agni. Sebastian knew Agni probably couldn’t care less about how cute his cats feet were but he humored him by sending him cat emojis in response.

There were a small number of flower pots on Sebastian’s front porch that he stepped outside to water. 

“Michaelis.”

Chills ran up his spine. He reluctantly turned from his porch to face his neighbor on the left. “What can I do for you today, William?” Sebastian asked with a heavy sigh and a hint of salt. His neighbor had been a thorn in his side ever since he moved into this place. There wasn’t anything he hadn’t complained about. From the color of Sebastian’s house to the way he kept his lawn. The cats he always saw in the windows were a problem for him as well, and according to him Sebastian’s car was an eyesore. 

“Don’t you think your yard could use some weeding?” his neighbor asked rudely while watering his own lawn.

Sebastian looked out over his yard to find a single dandelion sprouted in the center.“Goodness me, I really have let the place go.” he replied sarcastically. 

“It would behoove you to hire a landscaper, you know? Then we wouldn’t have this problem.” William said in a superior tone. Sebastian really hated him. 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” 

“I’d be happy to take on the job!” a friendly voice called from over William’s backyard fence. Blonde hair and black glasses frames peeked over the edge of the fence just enough that Sebastian recognized this person to be William’s regular gardener. 

“Thanks Ronald. I’ll remember that.” he replied with a little less frustration. Without another word, Sebastian turned away from the two of them and headed back to his door. He heard a loud clearing of a throat. Stopping, he turned on his heel to see William gesturing at the lone weed in Sebastian’s yard. Sighing loudly, Sebastian walked to the puffy yellow bloom and plucked it from where it grew. It seemed to satisfy William since there was no further scrutinizing before Sebastian made it back into his home.

***

The weekend had seemed unusually short so when Sebastian arrived to work on Monday he wasn’t quite prepared for the mental stress his job involved.

“Good Morning Sebastian!” Meyrin chimed when she caught sight of him in the doorway. 

Bard and Finny hadn’t shown up yet. Sebastian took his seat, turned on his computer and looked through his daily planner on his desk. His eyes skimmed over the words again and again but he wasn’t really retaining the information. 

“Good morning!!” Finny sang as he happily strode into the office swinging his lunchbox in one arm. Hearing his voice brought Sebastian back to earth. 

“Mondays...am I right?” Bard said from behind Finny as he dragged his feet into the room and dramatically plopped down in his chair. Sebastian chuckled and continued trying to work despite his own case of ‘The Mondays’. It wasn’t like him to be so distracted but today he felt his eyes keep wandering to his desk clock every fifteen minutes or so. His lunch break seemed to drag on forever. He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration as he glanced at the clock again. 

“You ok?” Bard asked from his desk, fingers laced behind his head and leaning back unprofessionally. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. The day is just taking forever.” Sebastian explained, finding himself to almost be complaining like Bard. 

“Are you doing something fun after work?” Finny asked curiously. “I find that days feel longer when I’m really looking forward to something.” 

“Just going to the...gym.” Sebastian felt his stomach do a backflip and for the briefest moment he could see thin arms loosely swaying and long legs leaping across the floor. 

“Well that doesn’t sound very fun...Is that fun?” Bard asked scratching his face and looking at both Finny and Meyrin. The two of them shrugged and the room fell to an awkward silence. 

Sebastian had realized that for the first time since he started this job he felt like he had something to look forward to after work.  
When the work day was over he quickly shut down his computer and set his desk back to rights. He was right on Bard’s tail out the door. “See you tomorrow!” He called over his shoulder on his way out.

The Gym was always busier on Mondays. “Probably people trying to start the week right. It clears out by Wednesday,” Sebastian thought. Much like the gym, the locker room was busier as well and Sebastian had to wait behind a traffic jam in the doorway before he could actually get inside. It was much more crowded in there since the space was smaller so Sebastian tried to change quickly and get out into the gym as fast as possible. 

Normally he would jog for a bit to get his heart rate up and then stretch before lifting weights but today he skipped right to the stretching and even did that with more haste than usual. With a pep in his step he strode over to the weight lifting area and approached ‘his’ machine where he spotted a man sitting on the bench. The man had black hair that swept back to one side, wore glasses and a tank top with huge holes where the sleeves should be. To put it frankly, “He looks like a douchebag” Sebastian thought. Sebastian hovered awkwardly around the machine hoping the man would finish and leave. He even tried sitting at an identical machine a few feet away and tried his best to see the classroom from there. No luck. The view was terrible. In a huff he shifted his weight and looked back to the ‘seat thief’ who looked like he would be finishing no time soon. With a heavy sigh, Sebastian approached him and tapped his shoulder. The stranger pulled out one of his ear buds and looked at Sebastian without a word. 

“Hey, are you about done? I need to use that machine.” 

“Use a different one,” was his reply. He put his earbud back in his ear. 

Sebastian tapped his shoulder again, this time with more annoyance. The earbud was once again removed although this time with an irritated sigh. “Listen. I need to use _this_ machine,” he specified with a finger. 

“Then you are going to have to wait until I am finished,” the spectacled man stated without even looking at Sebastian. He continued to lift weights while he spoke. In desperation, Sebastian looked at the man’s lap and noticed his black cell phone placed there with the earbuds plugged into it. 

“Look, Mr...what should I call you?” Sebastian began.

“Claude.”

“Ok. Look, _Claude_. I tried to reason with you, but you’ve left me with no choice.” In a flash Sebastian snatched the cellphone, swung his arm back and chucked it across the gym. It landed with a clatter on the belt of a treadmill that was in use which flung it off and underneath an elliptical machine. Unfazed, Claude stared straight ahead although his eyes burned with fury. He didn’t even look at Sebastian when he stood up and left to go collect his mistreated cellphone. Clearly he didn’t find the situation worth continuing since he didn’t come back afterward. 

Sebastian took his seat at the machine he fought for and adjusted the weight as though he actually intended to work out. Since he had waited around for awhile he had missed the first part of class, which was fine. The stretching wasn’t the part he wanted to watch anyways. Turning his head left and then right he made sure nobody was paying attention to him and then leaned in closer to the glass window in front of him. Across the lobby in the opposite room, the girls were arranged in rows, shifting forward and back, leaping one direction and then the other. A spin here and a dip there, before each girl slowly crept toward the floor into the splits. Each girl except one. It was the first thing Sebastian had ever witnessed _her_ do that wasn’t leagues better than her peers. She struggled to spread her legs far enough, visibly stuck, and even from across the hall, Sebastian could tell her face was becoming flushed.

Miss Red rushed to her side and knelt down to her level. With an awkward adjustment she was seated with one knee bent and the other straight and her head hung. Sebastian shifted forward on his seat and watched with concern. He wondered if she had hurt herself. The rest of the class watched as Miss Red consoled the embarrassed girl and helped her to her feet. She took a seat again against the wall, her knees pulled up to her chest and head buried in her arms. Was she crying?

The instructor clapped and continued on with class, perhaps adjusting the routine, although Sebastian couldn’t be sure. Even though the rest of the ballerinas were dancing, Sebastian’s eyes remained on the seated one. He didn’t even know her name but his heart broke for her. It reminded him of kittens at the shelter when all the others get adopted except one. He has to somehow take that one kitten all alone back to its cage to live by itself for the week. The isolation has got to be miserable. 

It became clear she wouldn’t be dancing any more today which made Sebastian feel even worse for her. Instead of waiting for the class to end, he got up and went straight to the locker room to clean up and change. He decided today he would talk to her. He would wait for her in the hallway and finally say hello; tell her he’s seen her dancing and thinks she’s incredible! This was his plan of course, but when class finally let out, _she_ was the first one out of the door and rushed right past the bench where Sebastian sat before he could even say a word. She flew down the hall clutching her white duffel bag and right into the girls locker room. Determined to not let that be the end of it, Sebastian waited patiently on the bench.

“ _She’ll come back out eventually and I can say hi then,_ ” he told himself. Several other girls followed her into the locker room and finally the hall fell silent. Sebastian sat awkwardly in the hallway, his eyes shifting from one thing to another with no particular reason. He shivered and blushed when his eyes landed on the ballet instructor whom he’d already been caught staring at, but this time she seemed to be staring at him. He sat up a little straighter as she peeked her head out of the classroom door. 

“Waiting for someone, handsome?” she said in a voice that seemed much deeper than what Sebastian would have expected. 

“I--uh! No, Just…” he stammered, begging the universe for a reason to end the conversation. The universe didn’t listen. 

“No need to be shy, dear. What’s your name?” she asked with a wink and a sultry lean against the door frame. 

“Sebastian...Mrs...?” he replied with uncertainty. Uncertain first about what he should call her, and secondly about whether or not he should lie about his own name. 

“Oh! Miss Darling! Miss Sutcliff…or Mister! It doesn’t matter, it’s all the same to me,” the red-clad instructor swayed with a smile. “In fact, if we are going to be getting more acquainted you might as well just call me Grell.”

“Miss Sutcliff it is, then.” Sebastian stated in a way he hoped was inoffensive but also clear that he was not actually interested in this fire engine of a woman. With a pout she turned to close her class door, stalling for just a moment to wiggle her hips. 

“Whatever you say, Sebby...You know where to find me,” she said with a wink over her shoulder. 

Sebastian drew his eyes away and onto anything besides the butt in front of him just as a few girls entered the hallway from the locker room. Neither of them were her though, so Sebastian kept waiting patiently. Whether in singles or small groups more and more people began to exit the building but Sebastian couldn’t identify any of them as her. After sitting there for thirty minutes he decided to leave. Waiting any longer could come across as creepy. With a sigh he stood from the bench, grabbed his gym bag and headed for the exit. “I’ll try again tomorrow.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the wonderful feedback I received on Chapter One! Here are a few notes to help with this chapter!
> 
>  **Pas de Deux** \- a dance for two.  
>  **Arabesque** (Ah rah besk) - a position on one leg with the other leg raised behind the body and extended in a straight line.  
>  **Croisé** (quo say) - A dancer stands with legs crossed at an angle to the audience.  
>  **Plié** (plee ay) - means bent, bending - of the knee or knees.  
>  **Pirouette** (peer o wet) - a rotation or spin - a complete turn of the body on one foot, on point or demi-pointe (half- pointe).

The harsh slam of the front door was his alarm clock each morning. It used to startle him but he had gotten used to the sounds of this house since he and his father moved in four years ago. As soon as Vincent left for work, that was Ciel’s cue to get out of bed even though the sun hadn’t risen yet. He sat up and swung his feet over the edge where his toes could barely touch the floor. Blue flannel pajama pants puddled around his feet as they stepped into a pair of slippers near the bedside table. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and let out a tired yawn while stretching and making his way to his bathroom. Catching a brief glance at himself in his full-body mirror, he frowned at the state his hair was in and unsuccessfully tried to hand-comb it down. The light in his bathroom was bright in contrast to the dimly lit bedroom he’d left and he had to squint to let his eyes adjust. Standing at the sink, he brushed his teeth and then pulled his oversized T-shirt off, tossing in the laundry hamper behind him. His reflection looked back at him as he turned one way and the other looking over the shape of his body, muscle definition and the over all fragility it displayed. With some disappointment in himself, he removed the rest of his clothes and climbed into the shower. His showers were typically short but every now and then he’d take an extended one while his mind wandered. Being homeschooled made his day less stressful since he didn’t have any real schedule to adhere to; just _one_ daily activity.  
Breakfast was usually his largest meal of the day since he was home alone and could take his time eating without being disturbed. Afterwards, he would gather his school work and take a seat in the office at his desk, right next to his father’s. Early morning sun began to peek through the bay window next to where he sat and he occasionally turned to look at the colorful sky. He found peace in the sky; he felt it had its own emotions. Even when the sky was angry Ciel felt calmer watching it, hoping someday he could make an impact the way _it_ did. Ever since his mother passed away he felt as though he lived alone. His father rarely spent any time at home and if he was home, all they ever shared were awkward conversations in passing; Ciel tried to avoid them at all costs. His anxiety ate at him from the inside, knowing he could never live up to what was expected of him, and that’s why the sky became his best friend. The sun never let him down and never asked questions. He didn’t have to explain anything to the moon and the stars watched over him while he slept like his mother once had.

***

Ciel spent most of the day reading a book titled The Woman in White, a mystery novel he had found at the library a week ago but hadn’t gotten around to reading yet. He curled up in an oversized arm chair near a large window while sipping tea. Quality time with his book and his _friend_ was enough for him to not feel lonely. He didn’t like people very much anyways. His attention was drawn away from his book when his phone started to buzz on the arms of the chair in which he sat. It was nearly two o’clock. Finishing the last sip of his tea, Ciel set a place marker in his book, which was actually a photo of himself, his mother and father. It was the only professional photo they had ever taken as a family. There used to be a large one on the wall in their old house, but Ciel’s father refused to hang it in their new home. He said it was too painful to look at every day, although Ciel knew he kept a copy in his wallet.

***

By late afternoon, Ciel fished out his white duffel bag from beneath his bed. He unzipped it, quickly making sure all of its contents were where they should be, and headed for the door and paused for a moment at the mirror to check his appearance before leaving. Walking through the kitchen he nearly passed by a half empty candy dish, but backtracked a few steps to snatch a lollipop and stuck it into his mouth. He slipped on his shoes, left through the front door and locked it behind him. He jogged from his yard to the bus stop at the end of the street and checked his wrist watch. He didn't particularly love riding the bus into town but felt safer than if he were to take a taxi.  
When the bus pulled up slightly late, Ciel guessed which driver must have been operating it today. The bus came to a stop and the door squeaked a bit as it opened. The driver looked down at Ciel and smiled as the boy climbed the steps up into the large vehicle. Ciel had guessed correctly. He didn’t like Lau, the driver who always seemed to stare just a little too long and smiled in a way that made the boy want to sit as far to the back as possible. “Have a seat, Ciel,” the Chinese bus driver said with a tilt of his head. Ciel flashed his bus pass and gave the man an awkward smile and shifted the lollipop in his mouth, before making a beeline for the back of the bus. He pulled his bag onto his lap and took a seat by a window, leaning his shoulder against it. The ride downtown wasn’t a long one during this time of day so Ciel didn’t have time to get too comfortable, which he was thankful for. When the bus reached his desired stop, he exited using the back doors and sped away on foot. With his hood now over his head, he kept his eyes low and clutched his duffle bag to his side. He always made a detour past his destination to avoid the stretch of road where his father worked. He prefered it if his father just thought he stayed home all day; it gave them less to talk about. Before finally approaching the community center, he took a glance over both shoulders to make sure he wasn’t being watched.  
Much like the rest of his trip, Ciel quickly sped to the women’s locker room and once more looked to his surroundings for any sign of other people. When the coast was clear he bolted inside, clinging to his hood to protect his identity and the modesty of any woman who might be in there already. He wasn’t some kind of peeping tom; he had other reasons for his actions. Once has was finally within the protective walls of a bathroom stall, he placed his back to the locked door and took a breath. His now finished lollipop was discarded into a nearby trash bin and he began to undress. The sound of rustling clothing was no stranger to a locker room but Ciel always felt like girls must be suspicious. He changed slowly and as quietly as possible, especially while concealing his gender securely and pulling tights up to his waist. He adjusted the toe of the tights and then put on his leotard which helped smooth out the parts he needed to hide the most. His final veil for his lower region was a semi-sheer white flounce which also helped give him more of a lady-like figure. The finishing touch to his disguise took the most work within the bathroom stall since he didn’t have a large enough mirror. He made due with a small compact palm mirror while he adjusted his false hairpiece and touched up the top bun it was pulled into. With the help of several bobby pins and a prayer, he managed to keep the wig in place even while dancing. Once he found his appearance to be passable, he stuffed his _street clothes_ into his duffel bag, slung his pointe shoes over his shoulder and exited the stall as he had every day for the past two years.

Nylon clad tip-toes made their way down the hall and into the dance studio where Miss Sutcliff stood looking at herself in the wall sized mirror. When she heard the door open, she turned her head and held her arms out with an enormous smile. “Cecilia! Darling! Always so early!” she praised while pulling her student in for a hug.  
“Heh, you know me…” Cecilia replied while awkwardly returning the hug and was abruptly dragged across the room to where Miss Sutcliff kept her bag. She rifled through it for a moment before revealing a tube of pale pink lip gloss. She turned to Cecilia and unscrewed the cap, and using her other hand to hold Cecilia’s chin still. With skill, Miss Sutcliff carefully spread cinnamon flavored lip gloss across Cecilia’s bottom lip, then rubbing her own lips together as an instruction for the younger girl to do the same. Cecilia reluctantly did as she was instructed.  
“Beautiful! It’s cinnamon, dear. The boys love a little _spice_ ”. Cecilia’s face flushed while she silently cursed the sticky goo on her lips.  
Before long, the studio held a gaggle of teenage girls stretching their legs on the barre. It seemed to always dissolve into giggly conversations between the girls which Miss Sutcliff would gently remind them to keep their focus. Cecilia however never participated in the social exchange. Having been home schooled, she didn’t share any mutual friends with her peers. It didn’t matter to her though, she didn’t want to be close friends with her classmates anyways; It just complicated things more. Besides, after her splits _incident_ yesterday, she wasn’t sure she even wanted to look any of them in the eyes.  
For the first time in a long while, Cecilia spotted a familiar face just outside the window. Her father, Vincent, was there, walking down the street carrying a sack of what could be assumed was his lunch. She felt her heart sink into her stomach as she turned away from the window, completely messing up the routine and caused Miss Sutcliff to stop the class. When she caught sight of Cecilia’s expression, she knew what must have happened and called for a short water break, gesturing for Cecilia to move away from the window. It had been nearly two weeks since the last close-call of that nature.

***

“Pirouette, pirouette, yes good, legs nice and straight now!” Miss Sutcliff called over the music playing on her nearby bluetooth speaker. “...and arabesque!”  
Cecilia’s body moved as if on autopilot. Keeping her hands and wrists relaxed, she stepped with ease and grace, her weight rested entirely on her toes, her other leg straight out behind her. Placing her pink shoe back on the slick wood floor, she spun into another series of pirouettes following the choreography of the routine the class had been practicing for a month. She felt guilty that the routine was being adjusted for her sake, since she was the only one in class that was unable to perform the splits. Miss Sutcliff never criticized her for it, in fact, she didn’t mention it at all. She merely adjusted the performance to avoid the position altogether and even though none of the other girls said anything, Cecilia was sure that everybody knew the reason why.

***

Class ended at four o’clock but Cecilia was never in a hurry to leave the room. She lingered near her instructor and didn’t say much but listened to Miss Sutcliff yammer on and on. When it seemed like the locker room might be more cleared out, she finally said a casual goodbye and headed for the door.  
“Dear, one more thing before you go.”  
Cecilia turned around. “Hm?”  
“I can tell you’re worried about… _yesterday._ ”  
Cecilia’s eyes adjusted to focus on the floor. She didn’t say anything.  
“You know, it’s not a big deal, really.” Miss Sutcliff continued, “The splits are hard for people like u--”  
“Don’t say people like us…” Cecilia interrupted.  
“What?” asked the bewildered instructor.  
“Don’t say people like us,” the student repeated. “ I’m not like you. I’ll never be like you.” Cecilia wasn’t sure who she _was_ like, but she knew she wasn’t actually female. She knew this was a charade all in hopes to hide her passion from her disapproving father, from everyone. Miss Sutcliff could be herself all day, every day. She could be male or female of her own accord. Cecilia was a girl one measly hour of the day, and only so she could freely express her passions without judgement.  
Before Miss Sutcliff could reply, Cecilia rushed out the door and down the hall. After an hour of dancing, her hair was slightly messy and out of place. A pearl dressed barrette slipped from her bun and clattered to the floor. She ignored it and kept her eyes low while clutching her bag to her chest, bumping into a muscular man who swiftly caught her by the arms.  
“Woah, hey, are you okay?” asked the man in a deep handsome voice.  
Cecilia’s mismatched eyes met the man’s auburn ones and her whole face burned red.  
“I’m sorry! I’m fine!” she said too loudly and attempted to push her way past the attractive man before her.  
“Hey wait!” he said, catching her arm gently.  
“Really! I’m fine!” she said again and pulled away. Her heart was pounding so hard she could feel it in her face.  
“I just...wanted to say hi. My name is Sebastian.”  
“Hi Sebastian,” she said in a hurry and pulled away again.  
Sebastian let go of her arm and she rushed down the hall. “Wait, please don’t go!” he called to her.  
She finally made it into the safety of the locker room. She closed herself in a stall, pushed her back to the door and took a bigger sigh than usual. She could still see those intense red-brown eyes, black hair and straight nose. She could hear his deep voice and it gave her chills. She immediately remembered rushing out on Miss Sutcliff. Her cellphone was deep within her duffel bag where she rummaged to find it. Once in hand, she opened her contact list and scrolled down to find her instructors name.  
She typed a quick message,“I’m sorry.” Sent. It was only a few seconds before she received a response.  
“I understand you better than you think darling,” the text read followed by a kissy-face emoji.  
Guiltily, she changed her clothes, removed the wig and wiped the lip gloss of her lips.

***

Outside the locker room, Sebastian stood at the closed door, dejected. Slowly he meandered back to the bench he sat at yesterday, hoping with all his might that a certain flirtatious dance instructor didn’t strike up conversation again. His eyes shifted to the floor where he spotted the barette his favorite ballerina had dropped. He bent down to pick it up and heard a low whistle behind him.  
“Usually, boys take me to dinner _before_ the show!” Grell giggled, clearly checking out Sebastian’s backside. Sebastian bolted upright and turned to face the salacious woman with an irritated expression.  
“Is the cost of dinner included in your _nightly rate?_ ” he asked while raising an eyebrow. Grells jaw dropped and the color of her face nearly matched her outfit. “How _dare_ you!?” she sputtered but Sebastian was already leaving the building, the pearl barrette concealed in his pocket.

***

After several minutes, Ciel poked his nose out of the locker room door to make sure the coast was clear before rushing down the hall to the exit, pulling up his hood while stepping outside. Clutching his cellphone within his pocket, the boy started running to the bus stop, keeping his eyes cast to the ground as much as possible. When he stopped for a crosswalk he heard a familiar clatter. He turned and faced the cause of the sound with a slight smile while shuffling his hands in his pockets. On the sidewalk there sat an old man with messy long silver hair which covered most of his face. Ciel could see some scars but never asked the man what caused them despite having met the man several times. “Hey again. Sorry, this is all I have for today,” Ciel said while dropping a small handful of change into the mans top hat where he jingled the rest of his earnings.  
“Quite alright my dear boy! Perhaps you could grant me the gift of laughter? Come now, tell me a joke!” the old man cackled in response.  
He was always like this and while Ciel didn’t mind trying to help him, he never came prepared with a joke. He considered briefly telling him about his experiences today; _that_ was a joke. With a glance to the now changed crosswalk light he thanked the stars and started to cross the street. He jogged backward.“Sorry Sir! I have to go! Maybe tomorrow!” he called before turning around and continuing on to the bus stop.  
“Of course! Of course! I’ll be here!”, the beggar cackled while slapping his knee.

***

When Sebastian arrived at home, he was relieved to see his less than delightful neighbor was not outside. He rushed to his door under the cover of such a blessing and ducked inside quickly. Like every day, he was greeted by his parade of cats, all begging for food as though he had not fed them this very morning. He tiptoed around them into the kitchen where he presented them with fresh food and water and carefully navigated back past them. Once his babies were taken care of, Sebastian plopped down on the couch and propped his feet up on the coffee table. He began to empty his pockets to get more comfortable. He set his cellphone and wallet on the table and felt an unfamiliar item still digging into him while he sat. He shifted slightly and extracted the remaining mystery piece, discovering it to be the barrette he picked up earlier. He had already forgotten about it. He sat in silence, as much silence as a house full of cats would allow, and fondly inspected the pearly hair piece. It was a very simple decoration consisting of nothing more than a few white pearls all lined up. Sebastian let out a sigh and clutched the barrette in his fist while he recounted his pathetic attempt to talk to _her_ today. He hadn’t even managed to get her name. “ _I just wanted to say hi!_ ” he mocked himself while covering his eyes with his free hand.

***

When Ciel arrived home he was happy to discover he had made it there before his father. He ran upstairs taking two steps at a time and rushed into his room where he slung his gym bag under the bed and set the bed skirt to rest. Finally allowing himself to catch his breath, he sat on the floor and leaned his head back against the mattress, focusing his gaze on the ceiling fan.  
Once he felt at ease, he left his room and headed back downstairs just as he heard his father’s key enter the front door lock. Ciel froze and momentarily considered running back into his room to avoid the awkward encounter but it was already too late. The door swung open and Vincent walked inside, placing his keys on a hook by the door and setting his briefcase down in order to remove his suit coat.  
Ciel didn’t _dislike_ his father, in fact, he respected him greatly. The man was the CEO of his own very successful company; he donated to charity organizations, as well as providing Ciel with everything he could possibly need. It wasn’t that Ciel thought ill of this man, it was that Vincent didn’t understand him, at all, presumably. Ciel had always been closer with his mother. She stayed home with him all day while his father went to work. She nursed him well when he got sick, bandaged his skinned knees and soothed him through his nightmares. He saw his father mostly at the dinner table where he would ask his wife about her day and let Ciel yammer on about what he had learned that day, things he wanted to do and the things on his plate he didn’t want to eat.  
Vincent always had a warm smile and a deep chuckle for his family and made sure to provide them with as much affection as his demanding job would allow, which turned out wasn’t very much. He was gone for extended hours of the day, occasionally on business trips, leaving Ciel and his mother home alone, for a week at a time. Playing catch in the yard wasn’t exactly Vincent’s style; Ciel’s fondest memory between the two of them was his father reading him stories before bed. Sometimes he’d beg for ,”Two stories! No! Three!” and Vincent would merely smile and comply to his son’s demands, although Ciel could rarely stay awake through two.  
Once his wife, Rachel, had become sick, Vincent changed somewhat. Ciel would see him in his office, face in his hands rubbing vigorously. The stress of being pulled between his family, his sick wife, and his company that wasn’t completely off the ground yet, Vincent struggled to determine which was more important: being with his family, or supporting them. By the time Rachel had passed away, Vincent was already a different person. Ciel wasn’t sure he ever saw him really cry, and because of that, Ciel attempted to hide his own crying. He would only do it in private places, such as his closet or in the shower. He knew his father loved him, he just didn’t know how to show it anymore.  
“H-hey, Father.” Ciel awkwardly stammered while shuffling into the kitchen, silently hoping this interaction would remain as friendly hellos.  
“Ciel!” Vincent greeted while he strode into the kitchen, “It’s good to see you outside of your room.” Just as Ciel saw a change in his father, Vincent saw a change in Ciel as well. He had hoped that moving into a new house in a new town would give the both of them a fresh start but Ciel only became more reclusive.  
Ciel didn’t know how to respond. There it was. The awkward silence. With his eyes cast to the floor, Ciel leaned against the wall and hugged himself with one arm.  
When Vincent caught sight of his son’s downward gaze he felt compelled to comfort him, but seeing as how he hardly ever had to while Ciel was young, he wasn’t exactly sure how to go about it now. “Are you okay?” he asked while pouring himself a glass of water.  
“Huh? Y-yea! I’m fine!” Ciel stuttered, straightening up his stance and waving his hands in front of him as if waving away his father’s concerns.  
More awkward silence surrounded the two. Vincent chugged his glass of water in an attempt to find time to say something else, but the best he could come up with was, “...if you’re sure…”  
“How was your day?” Ciel asked shifting the conversation away from himself as he attempted to stand as confidently as possible. He looked like a soldier, stiff and at attention.  
“Nothing out of the ordinary,” Vincent replied while opening the fridge, looking for something to eat.  
Ciel could feel himself holding his breath and he began to sweat as the silence continued.  
“We don’t really have much to eat around here, huh...kiddo?” Vincent attempted at a fatherly nickname for his now too-old-for-that son.  
Ciel appreciated the weak paternal attempt but could tell his father was just as uncomfortable as he was.  
“I--meant to go to the store today,” Ciel began, moving his eyes to the floor, “..I just lost track of time reading,” he lied.  
“Let’s order something.. What sounds good?” the emotionally inept man asked with a smile.  
“I’m not very hungry, actually, so whatever you want is fine...” his son replied before turning to head back upstairs.  
“Ciel...!” Vincent called to his son who was already halfway up the stairs.  
“Y-yeah?”  
The dead-air was becoming deafening.  
“Nevermind.”

***

It didn’t bother Ciel to be closed off in his room. He preferred it that way, although he did feel guilty for skipping out on dinner with his father. From the sanctuary of his room, he sorted out his laundry with the privacy he needed considering the clothing he hid under his bed. He made sure to cover those articles with other discarded clothing on the off chance Vincent ever entered his room, although that was extremely rare. Casually, he danced around his room while changing into something more comfortable and checked his phone, for no reason at all. The only person who ever texted him was Vincent and nobody ever called; he could barely recall what his ringtone sounded like. With a final pirouette, he spun right into his plush reading chair and snatched up the book he had been reading earlier.  
Curled up with a book in his lap was his favorite place to be. So many more interesting things happened in them. With his window open a crack for a breeze, he devoured chapter after chapter until the sun began to set. He was completely consumed by his mystery novel, unable to pull his eyes away until he heard the doorbell.  
He sat up straighter in his chair and listened closely for any sign of a visitor. A few moments later his phone buzzed from its wireless charging platform on the nightstand. He got up and retrieved it while folding his book shut. Using his thumb he punched in his passcode to unlock the screen, revealing a text from exactly whom he expected.  
“Dinner is here,” it read. Moments later another message followed, “It’s Thai. I hope that is okay.” He sighed in relief that his father picked something he could stomach eating, and then typed his response.  
“Thanks. Be down in a minute.”

***

The next morning, the usual slam of the front door alerted Ciel that he was alone again. Sitting up slowly, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and stretched. He began his routine of brushing his teeth, showering and getting ready for the day. Once he was dressed and his hair was dry, he hoisted his nearly full laundry basket up into his arms and carried it down the hall into the laundry room. The room was dimly lit by a window in the ceiling, and was always slightly colder than the rest of the house which made Ciel thankful for his slippers. He dropped the basket onto the floor and adjusted the settings on the washing machine. His ballet attire always went through the laundry first. While the leotard and tights ran through the delicate cycle, he placed up a folded up towel on the floor and sat on it with his back against the wall. He tilted his head up to look through the skylight at the now fading stars in the sky. The rhythm of the washing machine ran through his body as though it were the beat of a drum and he began to tap his toes together adding in the upbeats while he let his eyes fall closed.  
 _A thick red velvet curtain opens to reveal a single ballerina standing gracefully on the right of the stage. She is slender with glistening pointe shoes and a stunning rhinestone powder pink tutu paired with a matching bodice. Her neck is long and her hair is tightly pulled back and the hair piece holding it there is as sparkly as the rest of her attire. She can hear the Sugar Plum Fairy Suite playing over head and she begins to elegantly tip toe across the stage. With gentle wrists and a graceful swoop she raises her arms over head and a leg out behind her in an arabesque. With each step her tutu bounces delightfully and she moves with such ease it’s as if she were on clouds. She bourrees to the left of the stage which makes her appear to glide and then pirouettes back to the right. With a bright smile, she pauses there in a croise and turns her face to see a figure entering on the opposite of the stage. It is a man in perfectly clean white tights with a sparkling white tunic. Energetically he leaps across the stage and excitedly hops on one foot, bringing his feet together in the air. The ballerina cannot see his face even though he turns in her direction. His movements are rapid and graceful at the same time and he almost skips from one side of the stage to the other and back again. Happiness radiates from his extravagant voyaging toward her and back. He pauses for a moment opposite her and bows before raising a hand, gesturing for her to join him in dance. She pirouettes in place before joining him toward the center of the stage. She can see him more clearly now, but is still unable to see his face. The two dance in unison, leaping and hopping joyfully together. With his hands around her waist, she pirouettes in place, once, twice, three times, and more. Over and over and with each turn she tries to catch a glimpse of his face. The spinning finally stops and she turns to look at him intentionally. His eyes are_  
Beep!  
The washing machine finished running and the beat slowed to a stop. Ciel abruptly opened his eyes and sat forward as his daydream was ripped from him. He rubbed his eyes and with a huff he brought himself to his feet and rotated his laundry into the dryer. A buzz in his pocket alerted him of a text message, which he checked immediately. It was, of course, his father.  
“I left some documents at home on my desk. Would you bring them to me? Thank you.”  
Ciel read over the text message and leaned back against the washing machine. “Yes, be there soon.” he replied.

***

Dressed slightly nicer than usual, Ciel tucked a manilla folder full of documents under his arm, locked the front door and headed for the bus stop. He always tried to look more put together when he was going to be seen by his father’s employees. The bus arrived on time, which was a surprise because when the doors opened, Ciel saw Lau in the driver’s seat.  
“Earlier than usual today?” he said as the boy climbed the stairs and scanned his bus pass.  
“Yeah. I have an extra errand today,” Ciel replied, gesturing with the large goldenrod envelope. As he made his way to the back of the bus and found a seat, he could feel Lau’s eyes on him through the large rear-view mirror. It made him feel naked. Like somehow through all the layers of clothes he wore, Lau could see right through them; it’s as if he had X-ray vision. He did his best to avoid the attention of anyone else and kept his eyes pointed at the thick envelope he was holding while chills traveled up and down his spine.

***

**Watchdog Security Systems** was located smack in the middle of downtown and stood at the corner of two one way streets. Ciel could spot the building from several blocks away; it was one of the tallest buildings in the area and had an enormous silhouette of a dog’s head with a spiked collar. When he reached the main entrance, the glass doors automatically opened and closed behind him. He was greeted by a woman who was seated behind a reception desk.  
“Ah! Good afternoon, Ciel!” she greeted. He was pretty recognizable around the office since he looked so much like his father.  
“Hello, Paula! I’m here to deliver these documents to my father,” Ciel said with a genuine smile.  
“I’ll let him know you’re here!” she chimed and pressed a button on her desktop phone.  
For a moment Ciel let his eyes scan the lobby as he waited for Paula to contact Vincent. He caught sight of a familiar set of eyes and dark hair. It was as if time stood still when Sebastian and his co-workers walked together down the hall, coming back in from presumably their lunch break. Just before Sebastian set eyes on him, Ciel whipped his head away and turned his back to the quartet.  
“Sir? Your son is here!” Paula said into the intercom.  
“Ah, yes! Send him up! Thank you,” Vincent’s voice replied through the speaker. Paula gave Ciel a sticker with his name written clearly upon it. He stuck it onto the lapel of his blazer, and turned his head cautiously to check if Sebastian was still in the area. It seemed he was nowhere in sight so Ciel made his way quickly toward the elevators.  
“Thanks Paula!” He called quickly over his shoulder and slipped into the alcove of elevator doors. He felt like a spy on a secret mission as he pressed the ‘up’ button on the wall while nervously looking out toward the hallway, unsure of _his_ whereabouts. The numbers above the large silver doors counted down as one of the cabs descended to the bottom floor. Just as the numbers reached single digits, Sebastian and his entourage collected in the alcove just behind Ciel, who bristled up and clutched the envelope he carried against his chest. The elevator doors opened with a ‘ding’ and the group combined within the small carriage. A scruffy faced man pressed the button for the 13th floor. _‘If a person is afraid of a number, then they don’t need to be working for a security company,_ ’ Vincent had said when being asked about the blueprints for the 13th floor. The irony that Sebastian worked said floor was not lost on Ciel, as he pressed the key for the 50th floor, the very top.

“Oh hey! You’re Vincent’s son right?” a cheerful blond asked while leaning toward Ciel who shied away.  
“Y-yea,” Ciel replied quietly while keeping his eyes down.  
“What was your name again? I’m Finny!”  
Ciel could feel the whole group staring at him. He began to sweat and muttered out his name. “Ciel.”  
“You look just like your father, you do!” a bespectacled woman pointed out with a smile.  
“Thank you ma’am,” he said uncomfortably. He had always been told he looked more like his mother, but now that she was gone, she was no longer there to see a comparison. So now Ciel just looked like Vincent, and no one else.  
Sebastian remained quiet. He could sense the boy’s discomfort and opted to not make him feel any worse.

“What’re you doing around here, huh? Just visiting yer old man?” the scruffy faced man asked.  
Ciel felt that this elevator ride was dragging on. _How have we not reached the 13th floor yet!?_ he thought. “Just...making a delivery…” he croaked while tilting his whole face toward the floor.  
Ding!  
The elevator doors slid open and Ciel thought he might die on the spot. The chatty group of four exited the elevator. “Bye Ciel! Nice to meet you!” Finny sang with a wave as the doors began to close. Nervously Ciel waved back and let out a heavy sigh when the doors were finally closed. He leaned against the mirrored wall of the elevator cab and the ride to the top of the building was silent. It felt much shorter than the first thirteen floors had been.

***

Cecilia was somewhat distracted during rehearsal that day and during a series of pirouettes she bumped into the girl in front of her. Sebastian winced at the sight when he saw the girls collide. He had all but given up the guise of lifting weights while becoming the single-person audience of the girls’ ballet class. At least he actually lifted once or twice every few minutes while the less relevant girls were dancing.  
Cecilia apologized profusely for bumping into her classmate who seemed a little put off by the encounter but accepted her apology with a sigh.  
By the time class ended Cecilia felt as though she had been there for days.  
“Alright. What’s going on, Missy?” Miss Sutcliff asked, approaching Cecilia with her hands on her hips.  
From her spot on the floor, Cecilia looked up at her senior with an exhausted expression and then rested her face back in her knees.  
“I can’t do this anymore.”  
“Can’t do what anymore?” the instructor asked while taking a seat in front of her student.  
“I can’t keep this up! It’s too hard! It’s like the universe is trying to give me a sign,” Cecilia wailed before putting her face in her hands and rubbing roughly.  
“You’re going to have to start giving me some details, honey. I may _look_ like a goddess but I’m no mind-reader!” Miss Sutcliff replied, clearly exasperated.  
“There is this guy…!” Cecilia began but was interrupted by an excited shriek.  
“A boy?! Oh! Darling! Tell me all about it!” the now-gal-pal asked with a squeal.  
“...There is this guy who uses the gym here,” Cecilia explained seriously, “...and he tried to talk to me yesterday after class. He was very insistent to say hi.” Her cheeks began to turn pink while she continued the story.  
“Yesterday wasn’t the first day I’ve seen him linger around the locker room when I leave...and today I saw him at my father’s office! _He works for my dad!_ ” she nearly shouted. Grell was on the edge of her seat, practically drooling over the possible romance of the tale. Suddenly Cecilia’s face went pale and her eyes opened wide staring out the window into the hallway.  
There stood Tall, Dark and Handsome, Sebastian, waving at her and smiling like a dork. She felt her face suddenly get hot and her stomach fluttered as if she had just jumped off a cliff. Apprehensively she waved back to him and then tucked her face away in her knees.  
Miss Sutcliff followed her students mortified stare out to the hallway to see the girl’s admirer and spotted her very own sweetheart!  
“That’s him,” Cecilia grumbled into her lap and Miss Sutcliff looked back at her stunned.  
“THAT’S HIM?! Dearest, what is the problem? He’s gorgeous!”  
Sebastian tapped the glass to get Grell’s attention while he mouthed silently, “Is she okay?” His face full of concern.  
Grell nodded to him with a knowing grin and waved him away flirtatiously while blowing him a kiss. Sebastian pantomimed catching the kiss, tossed it over his shoulder and left the building. He took a seat on a bench outside and waited, hoping maybe he could catch her on her way out.  
“It’s not his looks that are the problem…” Cecilia stated while carefully raising her eyes to make sure Sebastian had left.  
“My dear, whatever the problem may be, love conquers all!” the love-struck woman exclaimed while clasping her hands over her chest.  
“I think he could be a spy for my father,” Cecilia said sternly, and Grell's merriment crumbled.  
“A spy? Why on earth--”  
“I don’t know,” Cecilia interrupted, clearly agitated, “But it’s not safe for me to leave this building as myself anymore...Not if I want to continue dancing.” Her eyes grew dark and she cast her gaze down to her knees. “I don’t know if I can keep this up.”  
“Of _course_ you can, sweetie! If you are half as good at acting as you are at dancing, this will be no problem at all!” Grell cheered with a wink.  
“What should I do?” Cecilia asked with exhausted eyes and wet lashes.  
“Well, to start, you and I my dear, are going to the mall.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for the wonderful comments and feedback! I'm super excited to know people are actually reading my fic! *u*

When Ciel had first met Grell, he was three years younger and three times more nervous. Approaching the community center for the first time was a feat that took several weeks on its own. Some days Ciel went to work with his father. He spent most of his time there in the front lobby, chatting with the receptionist. “Paula, give Ciel my card and tell him to go pick up something for lunch,” Vincent buzzed through the intercom. Ciel wasn’t sure why Vincent didn’t just talk to him directly. He knew well and good that Ciel was behind the receptionist’s desk reading, or doing some school work. 

“Right away, Sir!” Paula affirmed while sliding open her desk drawer and retrieving a small billfold, which she held out to Ciel. 

“Thank you, Paula!” he said when taking the wallet from her and slipped it into the pocket of his hoodie. “Would you like me to get you anything? It’s on dad!” the boy asked quietly, mischief in his eyes while he whispered not so inconspicuously. 

Paula giggled and shook her head, “Hahaha, oh no! I’m just fine, but thank you, Ciel!” 

He trotted off in search of somewhere to eat for lunch, his hood pulled up over his head to protect him from the brisk weather. Doing his best to dodge puddles, he struggled to keep his eyes both in front of him and on the sidewalk. He paused at a street corner and waited for the walk signal. When the crosswalk light indicated it was safe, Ciel stepped out onto the road and began to cross. Nearing the other side of the street, he could see a massive puddle that he would not be able to just step around; he was going to have to jump for it. Lucky for him, he was a lanky, long legged, thirteen year old boy. Unlucky for him, he happened to be a lanky, long legged, _uncoordinated_ , thirteen year old boy. He went to make a running leap, misstepped, and found himself on his knees, soaking wet in the expansive puddle. 

Embarrassed, he stood and looked around to see if any passers-by witnessed his impressive tumble. They had. His face now hot with unease, he gazed ahead and spotted a substantially large building. More specifically, a window filled with lights and moving figures. Staring more intently, he could see several girls in matching tights and shoes, hopping this way and that. Chiffon skirts flared out around their tiny waists as they spun. Dripping wet, Ciel stood there, now on the sidewalk, watching the team of ballerinas cavort in their beacon of a dance studio. When the young ladies stopped moving in their ending pose, Ciel was finally released from their trance, and realized he probably looked like some kind of creep. He hugged himself with a harsh shiver and continued on his search for food.

***

Later that same week, Ciel accompanied Vincent to work once more. He didn’t mind being home alone often, but sometimes it was nice to at least get out of the house, even if it was just to sit in the lobby of a huge office building and read. He was thankful that the weather was more sympathetic that day and therefore didn’t need to bundle up on his quest for lunch. Not necessarily on purpose, he found himself making the same trip he had done earlier. Subconsciously, he felt drawn to stand on the sidewalk outside the ballet studio and watch the girls practice. He had arrived at a different time during this day and the class was just about over for the three and four year old toddlers who undoubtedly were only taking the class because they had no choice. The young voyeur couldn’t help but smile as the uncoordinated feet pitter-patted across the wood floor. He watched as mothers and grandmothers picked up their daughters and grand-daughters with pride. A sinking feeling stung in his chest and a lump lodged itself in his throat. His eyebrows drew together while he shifted his gaze to the sidewalk. With his head down he resumed his roam of the city, refusing to look back at the building. When he felt a drip run down his cheek he convinced himself it had begun to rain.

***

This awkward peeping-tom behavior went on for several weeks. Ciel would sometimes even go downtown by bus, without his father knowing, just so he could walk past the building, which he refused to admit he longed to be in. He found himself becoming braver with his observations and would move closer and closer to the window as the days went on. Every once in awhile the instructor noticed him and would wave, which set Ciel’s cheeks aflame and he sped away.

Grell was beyond fed up with this little ogler. After class had ended for the teenage squad, Miss Sutcliff glanced out the window where she could see the boy all but staring as he tried to inconspicuously read a book while seated in the grass. The next time he peeked up from behind his novel, the two of them made eye contact and he froze. Grell smiled and curled a finger, coaxing Ciel to come closer. The boy looked around him checking to see if there was somebody else this red-clad lady was inviting inside. With nobody in the vicinity, he determined that she was in fact gesturing at him and he stared back at her frozen like a deer in the headlights. His mouth was slightly parted while he breathed somewhat heavier than normal and he slowly shook his head no. With a little more insistence, she urged him to come inside using her whole hand this time, but he still refused; instead, his heart pounded in his chest. He swallowed hard when he saw her quickly march out of her classroom and then out of the building itself. Ciel was on his feet in a second and abandoned his book to make a run for it. He had never been very quick or agile which made it all too easy for Grell to catch him. Seizing one of his arms, the ballet instructor yanked him backward and turned him to face her. Mismatched eyes stared up at her, one brown, one blue. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” the boy cried out, eyes wide while pulling against the adult woman’s grip with desperation. She returned his stare with a flirtatious grin and cocked one eyebrow.

“I’m flattered that you are so captivated by me, but I am afraid I cannot have you staring into my studio while my girls are in there,” she attempted to speak over his prolonged apologies. When it appeared that embarrassing the boy wasn’t going to shut him up, she brought one finger to her lips in a _‘hush’_ motion. The remorseful boy clammed up the instant he was told to, while his stomach did somersaults and tied itself in knots. 

_What have I gotten myself into?_ he thought anxiously, imagining what his father might say if he found out Ciel had been caught staring at girls through a window for weeks. 

Now that it was quiet, Grell paused to think of a different approach. This boy was younger than expected based on what she could see from her distant view in the studio. “Now..” Grell began intimidatingly, putting one hand on each of Ciel’s shoulders to hold him in place, “tell me, dear. Why do I see you staring at my dancers? Are you some kind of peeping-tom? A pervert?!” 

“No!” Ciel shouted too abruptly. “I just…” he averted his eyes from the woman before him and began to sweat. “I just like to… watch them dance...” he floundered. “I’m...I’m jealous of them…” 

Miss Sutcliff was taken aback by the boy’s honest confession. She stood up straighter and released his shoulders from her grip before giving him a confused smile. “Jealous? Darling, why don’t you join them?” she chuckled at the twist-conclusion to the peeper situation. 

Ciel still didn’t lift his eyes. He shifted uncomfortably while nervously aware of other people walking nearby. 

Sensing his unease, Grell took his hand gently and began to guide him toward the glass double doors into the community center.

He followed for a few steps before stopping, “No… I can’t.” 

Grell turned to face him, seeing the bleakness in his features. “Nonsense Dear! Anyone can learn to--”. 

Ciel interrupted, “No… I mean… I _cant_ ,” he said while pulling his hand away. 

Sensing that there was more to the story than she was being told she decided to push once more. “Alright. I understand. Would you at least come inside and have some lunch with me?” she asked with a genuine smile although she was determined to get to the bottom of this peculiar boy’s intentions. 

“Ok…” he replied reluctantly. 

The two of them sat inside the dance studio on the floor, sharing the lunch Grell had brought with her, although Ciel was too nervous to really eat any of it. Looking back at himself in the magnificent mirror, which he had only seen from far away until now, felt surreal and left him on edge; his heart hadn’t stopped racing since Grell had first welcomed him in. The silence began to make even Grell feel antsy which lead to her speaking her mind, something she hadn’t planned on doing until later. “So...tell me. Why can’t you join my class?” 

“...Ballet isn’t for _boys_ ,” he replied both plainly and apologetically. 

Grell only stared at him a moment before howling with laughter, “ You have _got_ to be kidding me, my dear boy! Who fed you that baloney?” 

“My father,” he stated while pulling his knees in towards his chest. 

“You asked your father if you could join dance and he told you no?” Grell clarified, now slightly more serious than moments before. 

“Well...not exactly,” Ciel mumbled into his folded arms that rested on his knees. 

He recalled overhearing Vincent having drinks with a friend back before they had moved, back when his mother was alive. The two men watched television and chatted over whatever _manly_ shows they watched. When a commercial for the russian ballet played, he recalled the two of them laughing at the make up the men had to wear, at the tights and feminine movements they made. “No self-respecting man would willingly put himself through that!” Vincent laughed before taking a sip of his beer. 

“No _straight_ man!” his buddy corrected, and they both continued to laugh. Ciel’s mother stepped in the room to jokingly comment that she thought the two of them were clearly drunk enough already, and didn’t need any more alcohol.

“He just wouldn’t approve.” Ciel explained quietly. He felt as though if he made his presence small enough he might disappear completely. 

“How do you know that if you haven’t even talked to him?” Grell questioned somewhat playfully, completely missing the gravity Ciel was feeling. 

The boy looked at his reflection catching sight of his shoes. He adjusted his feet to be parallel and detested their perfection. He thought of the ballerinas shoes and how worn and loved they were. How the shoes had as much experience as the person wearing them. His shoes were the same in that regard. He silently cursed himself for being ungrateful of his privileges, while simultaneously yearning for something else. 

“I just know, okay?” Ciel choked out while standing up. 

“What’s your name?” Grell requested. 

“What?”

“I said, what is your name?” She repeated. 

“Why does it matter?” the wary boy asked while turning to look at the woman he had known for all of an hour, tops. 

“Because… I want to help you. I think you’ll find we are more alike than you realize...and I’m pretty good at keeping secrets,” Grell said standing up and moving behind Ciel to look at both of their reflections. Green eyes met contrasting ones through the reflective glass and Grell gave the boy a reassuring smile. 

“My name is Ciel.”

***

By that evening, Grell had the runt of a boy convinced of her plan, while dragging him from store to store, selecting items here and there to assist him in becoming an entirely different person. Grell refused to let Ciel pay for anything, seeing as how this was entirely her idea. Several hours of shopping later, they had found the boy the necessary garments for class: canvas demi-sole shoes, tights, a leotard, a chiffon wrap around skirt, among other more private items Ciel was going to need. The last stop was a wig store, where Ciel uncomfortably sat in a worn leather spinning chair that faced a mirror. Grell and the shop owner, an older lady with fluffy white hair, adjusted wig after wig on Ciel’s mortified head.

“What do you think of this one?” Grells silky voice asked quietly while leaning closer to Ciel’s ear, “Come on now, open your eyes.” 

The disguised boy looked at himself hesitantly, surprised to see a hair piece that matched his own hue perfectly. Gray-blue curls hung around his shoulders and covered his ears where his side swept bangs blended right in. 

Taking Ciel’s silence, as opposed to the aversion he had toward the other ones, Grell decided this wig would be the one. The old shop owner folded the wig gently and tucked it into a bag that she then slipped into a box. “Well, I think that’s everything you’ll need love!” Grell sang as the two of them left the store, wig-box in hand. 

“...You really don’t have to do all this, Miss Sutcliff.” Ciel said meekly while shifting the several shopping bags in his hands, still unsure of how he had been convinced into cross dressing just to join a ballet class in secret. 

“Enough of that! I’ll take these for now. I’ll see you tomorrow at one o’clock to help you get ready before class,” Grell instructed while taking the plastic bags from Ciel. 

“Tomorrow?!” the boy exclaimed. He hadn’t expected everything to happen so quickly. Just this afternoon he was caught peeking into the studio and by tomorrow he would be learning to dance alongside the girls he had long observed.

***

When that fateful hour arrived, Ciel nervously entered the community center by himself. His father thought him to be at home and he planned to keep it that way. Finally taking a look around the lobby he found it humorous for the gym full of muscle-men lifting weights to be directly across from tiny thin girls dancing ballet. Each side forced to be blatantly aware of the others’ existence. When he entered the dance studio he was greeted by the bombastic instructor with open arms. She quickly ushered him into her tiny office at the back of the room and closed the door behind her. Ciel immediately realized how stupid he had been. He had known Grell all of a few hours the day prior but somehow completely trusted her. His mother always taught him not to talk to strangers, but much like her, all of his good judgement was gone.

“Are you ready for your transformation, darling?” Grell said in a sultry tone while tipping her glasses down her nose. 

“I… guess so,” Ciel answered nervously, awaiting his instructions. 

“You _guess_ so? Where is your enthusiasm!?” she asserted loudly, shaking the boy a little. 

Ciel made a face while his eyes looked around as if trying to find enthusiasm in the air around him. “I...guess so!” he said again, but with slightly more conviction. 

Grell sighed at him, clearly disappointed. “That will just have to do. Let’s get started.”  
She proceeded to give Ciel instructions on specific ways to conceal certain _physical_ aspects of his identity as well as the easiest way to get into the tights and leotard. She briefly stepped out of the room to give Ciel some privacy while he changed. She felt a tap on the door where her back was rested and turned around just as the almost-transformed boy slowly creaked the door open. 

“Is this right…?” the nervous ballerina-to-be asked while doing a half turn to show the back of the ensemble. Grell chuckled at the boys inability to put the skirt on properly and made quick work of the knot he made and showed him how to wear it. 

“Almost there, my little butterfly!~” the overjoyed instructor danced about as she retrieved the wig from her desk and assisted her little caterpillar-girl-boy to put it on and fasten it in place. With expertise she whirled the strands up into a top bun and fastened it there with a hair band and what felt like a thousand bobby pins. 

Ciel was convinced the wig was now embedded in his scalp and would never come off. 

In an excited flourish, Grell revealed the paperwork needed to sign up for the class, “Ta-daaaa. Just fill out the form here and here, and then sign and date the bottom.” She offered to waive the cost of the first month of classes until he felt comfortable, but Ciel insisted on paying, especially after all the shopping she had paid for yesterday. Besides, it’s not like he was hurting for money.  
“Miss Sutcliff, not to be cheeky, but what do I put as my name?” he asked warily while hovering the pen over the line labeled ‘First Name’. 

Grell laughed to herself at her oversight of such a detail. She merely used her own name but seeing as how Ciel wanted to be untraceable she began to give a false name some thought. “How do you feel about Cecilia?”

***

The caterpillar had become a butterfly.

A butterfly who now was annoyed to find himself at the mall. Again. With Grell. He wore his normal, everyday boy attire but still donned the wig in an attempt to not appear out of place in a women’s dressing room. His _mentor_ was dressed loudly as usual which made the two of them somewhat of a spectacle for other shoppers. Ciel knew nothing about women’s fashion, or anything about women for that matter. He followed Grell like a lost puppy around the plaza, silently begging to duck into a store for a moment of invisibility. As if answering his prayers, Grell directed them into a clothing store with beige carpet and long legged mannequins scattered about dressed in this and that. Cecilia missed the name of the store, but the walls were painted pink and a lot of the clothing there matched them. 

Grell began to sling different articles of clothing over her arm and looked back over her shoulder at Cecilia who was drifting slowly behind. “Listen here missy, if you don’t start picking out something _you_ like… you’re going to be stuck wearing only things _I_ like!” Grell threatened while wagging a finger in the young girl’s direction. 

Cecilia went pale at the thought of herself dressed garishly from head to toe, like a little pink miniature of her instructor. She awkwardly began to take hold of clothing in more muted colors. Mostly whites and powder blues were her color scheme, similar to her male clothes she had at home. She slung a pair of sparsely bedazzled blue jeans over her arm; they were the least glitzy ones she could find. 

Meanwhile Grell snatched hot pink shirts, and bright purple skirts, sparkly dresses and sequined shoes. The two shoppers met together at the back of the store in front of a wall of several dressing rooms. Each door was white with a giant pink number on it. Grell not so subtly flagged down a store employee to gain access into one of the rooms. 

Cecilia had been dreading this part. 

Quickly a skinny blond boy cantered over to the pair and greeted them with a warm smile. 

Cecilia turned her head down and let her bangs cover half her face. She recognized this boy almost instantly. While he shuffled through a ring of keys and unlocked one of the dressing room doors, she kept her face covered as best as she could.

“If you need different sizes, just let me know!” he offered as he began to walk back to his position at the register. Just as he passed Cecilia he slowed his walk and took a few steps back until they were face to face. The disguised boy froze as the two of them made eye contact. 

“Hey… Do I know you?” the employee asked while leaning a little closer to the girl in question. 

“N-no, I don’t think so,” Cecilia blabbed too urgently. She began to robotically move toward the dressing room that was waiting for her. The blond kept in line with her while walking in reverse.

“I’m sure I’ve seen you somewhere before. Where do you go to school?” he asked with a cocked eyebrow. 

“I’m homeschooled,” Cecilia replied quickly while ducking into the dressing room. She swiftly closed the door behind her and latched the lock. With a heavy sigh she leaned her back against the wall. ‘That was close’ she thought while dumping her arm full of clothes onto the fluffy bench against the back of the closet-like room. 

“Cecilia, sweetie. You’ve forgotten some things to try on!~” Grell sang at the closed door, jingling the hangers of the attire she had selected. Cecilia began to open the door just a crack for her hand to each out when she heard the familiar blond interject. 

“Cecilia?”

Cecilia froze and she could feel her stomach go cold as it dropped, curled up and died there. A well manicured hand clutched the edge of the door and pried it open a little further. When the two _boys_ met eyes once more there was no more escape. Cecilia shrunk down, her whole face warm and pink. 

“I knew it!” the store employee exclaimed with a smile as he pried the door open all the way.  
“Ciel! I’d recognize those eyes anywhere!” 

Cecilia’s face paled suddenly at the sound of her _real_ name. 

“Hey now! You can’t just go opening a ladies dressing room, you pervert!” Grell interjected while shoving a shoulder into the doorway in front of her student. 

“Pervert? Hah hah!” The supposed peeping-Tom laughed, “Ciel and I have changed in front of each other plenty as kids! We used to ---” Cecilia interrupted his story by covering his mouth with a hand while the other hand grabbed him by the shirt and yanked him into the dressing room with her. Slamming him against the wall, she closed the door behind her, leaving Grell on the outside of the door still holding an armful of clothes. 

“Alois, could you please just shut up for one minute?!” Cecilia whispered harshly in the blond boy’s face, her shoulders tense and brow beginning to sweat. 

“...would you just explain what’s going on?! What’s with the get-up!? Are you a girl now?! Oh my GOD are you a _girl_ now!?” Alois rambled on in both confusion and shock while looking Cecilia up and down as if the answer were written somewhere on her clothing. 

“No! I’m not a _girl_! It’s just---” Cecilia began in a panic, but stopped short realizing just how long this story could become and how ridiculous it sounded. She lowered her gaze and her aggressive stance shifted back to the nervous uncomfortable slouch she was used to. 

“Hey now you two, keep it PG-13 in there!” Grell sang from the other side of the door with a knock. All assumptions about perversion whisked away when Cecilia _romantically_ yanked Alois into the room with her. 

Alois cackled, “That’s what they used to say to us in the locker room too!”

“No! No they didn’t! Would you quit it!?” Cecilia howled and covered Alois’ mouth again, this time with both hands. 

“Okay, Okay! I’m sorry!” Alois replied through mashed lips and the spaces between fingers. Slowly he used his hands to pull Cecilia’s off his face and gave her a more serious expression. 

“...but are you alright?”  
“...Yes. I’m fine. Can I… Can I fill you in on the details later?” Cecilia asked apprehensively while fidgeting with her fingers over her stomach. Alois could sense her unease and being a long time friend of Ciel, decided to calm the mood.

“Yeah. Of course.” Alois replied softly. The two of them stood a foot away from each other in silence for several long moments before the quiet finally started to make Alois uncomfortable. 

“So! You’ve got a special occasion coming up I take it?” He said with a customer service smile while casually exiting the dressing room as though he was just doing his job. 

“I…. uh. Well. Not really special. It’s more like---” Cecilia stammered, taking a few steps out of the dressing room after her friend, but was loudly interrupted by her bright red mentor. 

“It’s for a date!” Once more Cecilia’s face turned a color rivaling Grell’s hair in brilliance. She waved her hands at Grell as if shooing away the very suggestion of a ‘date’. 

“No no! It’s not a date! It’s more of a…” she stopped herself when she met eyes with a pair of other shoppers who clearly were overhearing the conversation. The word she had planned on using to finish her sentence had been ‘disguise’ but that would have sounded exceptionally fishy to any eavesdroppers obviously lurking about. Instead she finished with a heavy sigh and, “It’s a date….” The word felt unnatural on her tongue. She had never been on a date, not as Cecilia nor as Ciel. The only “girlfriend” Ciel had ever had was in daycare when a curly haired blonde girl decided the two of them were going to get married someday and forced him to play house with her on the regular. He was five at the time and didn’t figure his occasional sharing of candy and birthday cards really counted as much of a relationship, in fact it embarrassed him to even be considering it when trying to think of ever having been on a date. 

“A date? How exciting! How did you meet the lucky fellow?” Alois asked with more of the same customer service voice. 

“Could we please just stop talking about it and get this over with?” Cecilia grumbled while taking the armful of clothes Grell was holding and shuffling back into the dressing room with a huff. 

Alois and Grell exchanged glances in regard to Cecilia’s less than cheerful demeanor. They both decided to shrug it off and waited patiently for Cecilia to open the door once she had changed. 

The white door of the dressing room cracked open ever so slightly and Cecilia’s tiny nose peeked out through the narrow opening. “Is… is this right?” she peeped. 

Grell rushed to the door and peeked in through the tiny crevice allowed to her. “Well, you have to let me see, dear,” she insisted, gently trying to push the door open wider. Cecilia stood there in a yellow sun dress with frilly straps and ruffles along the bottom hem and was printed in a tiny blue floral pattern. Grell smiled with excitement and began to chuckle when Cecilia turned around and revealed what was giving her problems. The back of the dress was low cut and had some interesting twists in the straps which Cecilia had somehow figured out how to miss in some places and twist in others. 

“Here, let me help,” Grell said while reaching and adjusting the straps to sit properly. With a sigh of relief Cecilia looked at herself in the full length mirror in the room. 

“Ugh, that feels way better. What is with girls and all these complicated outfits?!” Cecilia complained while gesturing to several other garments she had obviously tried to put on and gave up. 

“Beauty is pain, darling~!” the elder woman chimed while opening the dressing room door all the way to let Alois see. 

Cecilia wasn’t prepared to become a spectacle and instinctively tried to cover her legs with the bottom of the dress. 

“It fits you perfectly!” Alois cheered, this time in a genuine tone and a clap of his hands. 

“Great... thanks,” the living-doll said quickly and tried to slam the door shut. 

Grell’s hand caught the door and she encouraged Cecilia out of the room with a gentle push. “Go on! Give us a twirl!” 

“...Do I have to…?” the younger girl shyly begged for a shred of dignity. 

“If you can’t even leave the dressing room, how do you expect to leave the house like this?” Grell asked with a knowing tone and another gentle nudge. 

Reluctantly, Cecilia took three deliberate steps out of the dressing room and tried her best at a casual stance, letting the dress hang to its natural length at mid-thigh. She gave one very awkward and stiff 360 degree spin before stopping and looking at Alois with an anxious stare, as if asking for his honest opinion. 

“You look adorable!” he praised moving closer to his anxious friend. Using both hands, he lead Cecilia toward the large tri-fold mirror near the wall by the first dressing room. Grinning ear to ear, Alois fluffed Cecilia’s ruffled straps, and brushed her bangs out of her eyes, which she immediately shook back down the way she preferred them. 

Skulking back into the dressing room she peeled the dress off and exchanged it for something a little more modest. The door swung open again, this time with more confidence. White capri pants and a powder blue sheer blouse combined with a matching tank-top had been her choice. It looked strikingly similar to clothes she already owned, just in the male version. Suddenly she was being decorated in a multitude of accessories. The dressing room door wound up being ignored entirely as Alois and Grell fought for a view into the room to adjust different outfits and embellish the looks further. Purses, shoes, bracelets, hair bows, rings! Cecilia was beginning to lose count of the things she had tried on and things she hadn’t. Nearing the last few garments, Cecilia had finally become more accustomed to the attention and wasn’t really surprised by her reflection anymore. The last item she picked out was a lavender dress made of venetian lace. It was tight in the bust and sleeves but flared out at the waist, giving her the illusion of hips. Alois tossed a woven sun hat on top of her head and nodded his approval. A hint of a smile grew on Cecilia’s face as she admired the ensemble and began to casually turn around to see it from all angles. Grell’s little butterfly was finally becoming less uptight about the situation, so she decided not to tease the poor girl, lest she spiral back into her shell. 

Alois reached to Cecilia’s armpit and plucked the tag from the dress, “You’re wearing this one out of here!” he declared while scampering off to the register where he began to ring up the clothes that had survived the evaluation and would be going home with Cecilia. 

“Wait! I can’t! I can’t go _home_ like this!” she wailed after the excited cashier. 

“Of course not, dear...but you _can_ wear it for the rest of our shopping spree!” Grell purred while escorting Cecilia to the register. 

“There’s **more** shopping?!” she asked in utter disbelief. _What else could I possibly still need?_ she asked herself while looking over the ocean of ladies clothes that covered the counter. 

“Of _course_ there is more shopping, silly! We’ve only just started!” 

“Just started?!” she repeated incredulously. 

With some more convincing from Grell and reassurance from Alois, the student-teacher duo paid for the clothes and left the store, Cecilia still in the dress she last tried on paired with white sandals. She felt a little better now that her disguise was more believable, but the feeling quickly melted away when the two of them approached a store that she hadn’t even considered. Lace panties and matching bras attired otherwise completely bare mannequins in the store windows. 

There it was. That sinking feeling that she was in way over her head. Stopping several paces from the door she looked onward with horror. “I can’t go in there!” she fussed with red cheeks and white-knuckled fists clutching her shopping bags. 

“Don’t be that way!” Grell huffed as she grabbed Cecilia’s wrist and tugged her closer to the entrance.

“Are you insane? There is nothing in there I could possibly need!” she sputtered, pulling back against Grells tug. 

“Every lady needs a good bra, sweetie!” 

“But I’m _not_ a lady!” the two argued while other shoppers began to rubberneck and eavesdrop while walking by. When Cecilia noticed they were creating a scene, she instantly clammed up and stopped pulling, letting Grell yank her into the scandalous store. 

“Lady or not, you need a bra!”

***

Stuffed inside a tiny dressing room once more, Cecilia felt her patience growing thin. Grell and the overly touchy saleswoman continuously handed her bra after bra over the dressing room door. She sat on the stool in the corner of the stall and stared prudently at the stack of undergarments hanging on the wall.

“Do you need help? You’re taking an awfully long time!” Grell called over the door, effectively embarrassing Cecilia further. 

“Do I really have to? There isn’t a point to this! It’s ridiculous!” she grumbled back, crossing her arms over her bare chest, that in no way needed a bra. 

“Open the door, sweetie,” Grell said flatly, clearly losing her patience as well. She was determined to educate the young girl on what a silhouette was and how much a bra and panties improved the look over a flat chest and boxer shorts. Cecilia reluctantly opened the door just a crack and Grell pushed the rest of the way in, closing the door behind her. It was an awkward struggle between the unwilling and the educated as the two refused to give in to the each other. 

“Just...Humor me, would you? Try on just one. If you don’t want it afterwards, I won’t make you get it,” Grell offered and Cecilia begrudgingly agreed to the compromise. She picked out the most boring plain white bra with tiny pink roses, no lace or bows. It had a small amount of padding to help push up what wasn’t actually there. With the experience and finesse of an experienced bra wearer, it pained Grell to watch the girl tangle herself within the very simple straps. 

“Darling, it’s a bra, not a spider web.” she said while holding Cecilia’s arms still so she could assist her in un-twisting the straps. She hooked the clasp in the back and snapped it to which Cecilia jumped and reached for her back where the bra strap stung. 

The blossoming young lady looked at her reflection with disdain. She didn’t fill out the cups at all despite how little cup there even was. She put her hands around the bra cups and crushed them inward with an annoyed sigh and looked at Grell with contempt. Grell handed Cecilia a blouse they had purchased earlier with a smug look on her face which made Cecilia grimace. She resentfully took the shirt and slipped it on while Grell stood back and watched. Almost immediately Cecilia spotted a difference in her figure. The undergarment had done what Cecilia believed impossible: She looked feminine. Suddenly a waist seemed more pronounced and the shirt covered the emptiness of the cups, leaving Cecilia both surprised and demeaned while she turned her focus to Grell’s self-satisfied expression behind her in the mirror. 

“Well…?” the more experienced woman asked knowingly. Cecilia resigned and sighed, quickly taking the shirt off and reaching for the clasps of the bra. 

“I’ll get the stupid bra.”

“...and the matching panties.” Grell added holding up a pair of modest white panties with matching pink roses and a small scalloped elastic band.

***

Ciel was relieved to finally be home and finished shopping, although fitting all of the new clothes under his bed was a triumph in itself. He just finished stuffing the last dress under the dust ruffle when he spotted the bag of underwear. He frowned and grabbed the bag and shoved it under the bed pushing it way to the back.

He sat on his bed protectively like a chicken on it’s nest. He scrolled through his contact list on his phone, wondering if he even had Alois’ phone number. To his surprise, he did, although not listed under “A” for Alois, but “S” for Swim Team - Alois. Without thinking he typed a text and sent it.

“Hey, It’s Ciel. Thanks for your help today. Sorry for such a weird encounter.” It then dawned on him how old this phone number was and that Alois had likely changed it by now. Anxiety bubbled in his stomach as he awaited a reply. 

“Sorry, Wrong number.” 

Ciel wasn’t sure why, but he was embarrassed for texting a stranger his sincere feelings accidentally. Finishing his nightly routine of brushing his teeth and plugging in his phone he climbed into bed. He thought that he should probably go back to the mall before summer ended and get Alois’ new number. It had been since before his mother died that he and Alois had seen each other, and he was considerably lacking in the friends department. He cast his gaze out the window, where it was greeted by the moon’s heavenly face. He smiled and silently said goodnight before rolling over and closing his eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey again! Sorry it took so long for this update! I have had a ton of stuff going on! This chapter is also quite a bit shorter than the others which i apologize for. I just figured it would be better to post something more often rather than one long chapter every few months!
> 
> Let me know which you guys prefer and what you think of this chapter!

Getting dressed was proving to be more complicated than Ciel had anticipated. As soon as Vincent left for work, he sprung from bed, having barely slept a wink, and dug out all of the clothes from beneath his bed. He had always considered himself a decent dresser but that was by men’s fashion standards, whereas women’s were entirely different. He silently cursed his situation and wondered if he could just find a different ballet studio. 

“ _No. Miss Sutcliff’s gone through so much trouble for me…_ ”, he reminded himself as he flung clothing this way and that trying to remember which items went together and with which accessories. 

“Female fashion is so stupid,” he muttered under his breath once he finally decided what to wear and hoped it would pass the scrutiny he would undoubtedly receive when Grell set eyes on him. 

Dark blue skinny jeans and a pale pink blouse was what he decided to wear for the day. He remembered Alois mentioning that ‘Jeans go with everything!’ After a shower and furious deliberation on whether he should wear the panties he was forced to buy, he opted not to.

“ _Grell will never know_ ” he thought. He did however attempt to wear that godforsaken bra and managed to get it on despite the firm knowledge something in the back was very twisted and he had no idea how to fix it. His slim legs slid effortlessly into the stretchy blue jeans and the waistband set just below his belly button, a style he insisted on. His fingers struggled with the button and zipper as women’s clothing fastens opposite of men’s, a detail he failed to notice until now; it was another thing to add to the laundry list of things he didn’t understand about fashion. Putting the wig on was a lot easier with a full size mirror as opposed to the small compact one he typically used in the bathroom stall. There was much more elbow room and a counter to set the bobby pins on, in addition to better lighting and no risk of dropping everything on the floor. 

Butterflies fluttered around in her stomach as Cecilia reached for her bedroom door. As soon as her fingers wrapped around the handle the butterflies turned to worms squirming upwards into her throat. She lingered there for several long moments, considering whether or not to go through with this. 

“It isn’t too late to quit,” she told herself with trembling fingers clutching the silver door handle. Closing her eyes, she took a slow deep inhale and held it for a moment.

_Velvet curtains opened revealing a ballerina to a packed audience of faceless people. Casting his eyes down to his feet, he immediately froze catching sight of casual slip on sneakers. Now using his hands, he felt up his body to discover jeans, a T-shirt and a blazer. A rock dropped from his throat to his stomach and his face heated up. An entourage of beautifully dressed ballerinas tiptoed from either side of the stage, pirouetting around him, showcasing his embarrassing display of masculinity. Howling laughter echoed through the auditorium and he could all but feel disappointment radiating from his father who wasn’t there to see it._

Harshly she exhaled the breath she had been holding for too long and leaned against the door for stability, having become light headed. Busy thoughts raced through her mind in ways she couldn’t make sense of. Anxieties and fears mixed with passions, secrets, wants and dreams. Her body moved on auto-pilot as she opened the door and descended the stairs down to the kitchen. It wasn’t until she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the stainless steel fridge that she realized she had made it downstairs alive. 

Nervously she left her house and approached the bus stop, keeping her eyes down despite being the only one there. When the bus pulled up to the curb and the doors creaked open, her body went cold. Each agonizing step up into the large vehicle echoed in her head and her mouth went dry. Lau only watched her with intrigue but didn’t say a word. It wasn’t until then she had realized the bus pass had her photo on it. Well, _Ciel’s_ photo. With an awkward and fumbling hand she flashed the bus pass while keeping her face angled down. In a rush she scuttled past Lau and to the very back of the bus where she hoped she would be unnoticed. It didn’t matter if Lau was staring again or not; she refused to look up at the rear-view mirror and instead kept her eyes down on her shoes and nervously fiddled with the end of her wig.

If the bus ride didn’t kill her, making the journey to the community center would. She had a panic attack at every turn. While passing by somebody who looked vaguely like her father, she’d duck behind a nearby car. The familiar buildings she had passed every day for years now seemed like windows to the ‘Cross-Dressing 101’ exhibit and she was the main attraction. Once the community center was within view, she began to make a run for it, panting and sweating the whole way there. 

Now inside the locker room, Cecilia began to calm down. No Sebastian sightings. _What luck!_ She had done it, and while the experience was miserable and exasperating, there had been no exposure of her true self to anyone; except for maybe that nosy bus driver. She decided to shake that thought from her mind as she began to change into her leotard and pinning her wig up into place for class. A familiar voice whispered softly through the crack in the stall door. 

“Cecilia? Dear?” 

Cecilia jumped and dropped her barrette, “Y-yea?”

“How did it go?” Miss Sutcliff asked through the narrow space once more. Cecilia carefully unlocked the stall door and opened it a crack to meet eyes with her teacher. 

“I mean.. I’m here. Alive.” She said dramatically as though being found out meant literal death for her. Grell only chuckled and pinched her cheek fondly.

“Good girl. See you in class!” she sang as she left the locker room. 

Ciel had been called ‘girl’ plenty of times since he started ballet, but for some reason this time felt different. It left his stomach in knots of both relief and disgust.

***

As Sebastian warmed up for his work out he unintentionally counted the number of songs he was listening to on his phone. Without realizing it he had committed to memory that nearly twelve songs would be half way through the dance class he anxiously awaited the end of. Watching her dance was no longer enough for him. If he had to sit still and watch her wistful expression and sad eyes from across the hall while still not knowing her name he was going to go crazy. This knowledge left him able to actually work out now. He took out his frustration through sprinting on the treadmill and aggressively lifting weights. Around the end of twenty five songs the ballet class was over and Sebastian could see the students begin grabbing their things and filing out of the studio. He rushed his way over to the men’s locker room to clean up and change. He took some extra time in the mirror before leaving hoping he could make a better second impression. He was determined to get her name today.

As if on queue, the girl in question had just shyly exited the women’s locker room behind a few other girls. She did her best to duck behind them as a barrier, hoping she wouldn’t be spotted. She might as well have been in a spot light on a pedestal; Sebastian noticed her instantly and felt his heart beating a little faster. “ _What if she shuts me down again?_ ” he thought to himself before his legs moved on auto-pilot in her direction. 

Cecilia could see Sebastian approaching out of the corner of her eye and walked faster in an attempt to avoid him but it was plainly clear he was making a bee-line straight for her. She froze and clutched the strap of her gym bag tightly in her fists. Once Sebastian was within a couple feet of her, she shyly nodded at him.

“Good afternoon, Sylvester.” The words left her mouth in an apathetic murmur, and as soon as they did she began to speed walk past him toward the exit. 

“Oh, uh. Yeah, It’s _Sebastian_ actually,” he corrected while speed walking behind her to catch up. 

“Oh. Sorry.” was her detached response before pushing the double doors open and whisking outside without holding the door for him. Sebastian was a little unnerved at her disinterest but his gut insisted he keep trying to get her attention. 

“Hey, wait up a second!” Sebastian called to her from the steps of the court yard. His words fell on intentionally deaf ears as _the girl of his dreams_ continued walking away. Her eyes followed the sidewalk, only looking up to check for oncoming pedestrians. Sebastian jogged quickly to catch up and once he reached her side, he let out a breath before speaking. 

“Did I say something to offend you? Do something?” he asked almost incredulously but still retaining his manners while gesturing with both palms up; welcoming her answer that he almost didn’t expect to come. 

“No.” was all she replied. He nearly didn’t hear it. She spoke so quietly and quickly, clearly wanting the conversation to be over. 

“Is something wrong then?” Sebastian urged, mentally kicking himself for asking another ‘yes-or-no’ question. 

“No.”

Sebastian kept up with her pace, and asked himself why he was trying so hard to get the attention of this girl whom, in his opinion, was kind of a brat. Just as soon as he had finished that thought, the two of them stopped at a crosswalk and waited for the signal to change. He was about to interrogate her further when he noticed her pull a handful of change and a lollipop from her bag and drop it loudly into the cup of a homeless man seated around the corner on the block. 

“Sorry I don’t have much change today,” she nearly whispered. The old forlorn man raised his eyes from his cup to make eye contact with her. She froze, and suddenly remembered her attire. Her heart was pounding. 

“Oh it’s you! I almost didn’t recognize you!” the messy haired man laughed.  
“Got yourself a boyfriend with you today?” he teased while bringing his fingers to his lips in a chuckle. The bluish shade of Cecilia’s hair only emphasized the deep red her cheeks were becoming. 

“No! He’s not my boyfriend! He’s...He’s...not even my friend!” she wailed while waving her hands out in front of her. Sebastian’s cheeks began to heat up as well while he watched the ballerina flail in desperation. The vagrant clutched his sides and doubled over in howling laughter. A walking man lit up on the crosswalk signal across the intersection and Cecilia was beyond relieved. 

“Thank you for the lollipop and the laughs! See you later!” the homeless man called to her between his guffaws. 

_A brat...but with a heart of gold_.

***

He recalled himself finding his oldest cat, Loaf, huddled under a bush near a gas station. She was dirty and patchy and had broken whiskers. Her grey and white fur was nearly all brown with mud and other gas station filth. He went inside the convenience store, bought a can of cat food and attempted to coax the cat out but she was not having it. He went back the next morning with kitty treats, but this stubborn feline would not leave her sanctuary under the bush. Determined to rescue this poor fluff-baby he returned to the bush, twice a day at least, for a week. Sebastian had planned for Saturday to be his last attempt. He was running out of ideas. He had tried slimy wet cat food, crunchy dry cat food, kitty treats, yarn, mouse toys, a laser pointer and catnip. Occasionally he felt like she was beginning to emerge but would always scuttle backward into her cave before he could nab her.

By Saturday he had grown discouraged but told himself if he couldn’t get her maybe she was just meant to live outside. This was a statement that didn’t sit with him. He knelt down to the bush and called to her until she popped her head out and saw him. The two made eye contact for several long moments. He slowly reached his hand for her to sniff which she did. He secretly rubbed catnip spray into his skin before approaching. He congratulated himself on a successful scheme when the cat finally rubbed her head against his palm. Her fur was crusty and dull, not the way a baby like that should feel. Suddenly he grabbed her fur behind her neck and gently pulled her from the bush. She was none too happy about this invasion and voiced her feelings by howling loudly and growling. The cat-napper stood up frantically holding that mangy, angry, adorable ball of claws to his chest where he had a better grip on her. He looked around not sure what to do. He had never thought he’d get this far. In a panic he ran to his car and tossed the cat into the passenger seat slamming the door behind it. He now had a very ticked off fur-baby trapped in his car. Once she had calmed down he took her home, gave her a bath which she surprisingly didn’t seem to hate all that much, fed her and began his hunt for a vet. Hundreds of dollars worth of vaccinations, medications, grooming and dental work later...Sebastian had his very own bundle of joy to keep forever. In the end all of his efforts had been worth it.

***

“Would you stop _following_ me?” Cecilia grumbled quietly to the man next to her. Sebastian stood up a little straighter and folded his arms over his chest while looking down his nose at her. The tiniest smirk graced his lips when he sensed his delicious victory.

“Not until you talk to me.” He said firmly as if the whole idea wasn’t a creepy stalker move. 

Cecilia stopped walking and angrily crossed her arms as well. She didn’t want to look up at him. She couldn’t. She clenched her jaw and replied with, “Fine. What do you want?”

Sebastian could barely believe it. It was as if he had just unwrapped the golden ticket to gain access into this girls head and discover who she really was! He was so caught up in his triumph that he had completely forgotten what he was even going to say. He looked at her for several long moments before Cecilia spoke up again.

“Nothing? Great. Then I’ll be going home now.” 

“Will you go to lunch with me?” Sebastian blurted out over Cecilia’s voice desperately. He had to say something, _anything_ , to keep her from leaving now. 

“Ex...Excuse me?” she replied and finally looked up at him, flabbergasted. 

“Will you go to lunch with me?” he repeated, this time with a little more confidence. 

“It’s...It’s well past lunchtime!” Cecilia offered as an excuse. 

“Dinner then.” 

“You...You don’t even know my name!” she raised her voice incredulously thinking this man had to be the most desperate man she had ever met. 

“What’s your name?” Sebastian returned quickly, not missing a beat. Cecilia couldn’t believe what was happening and Sebastian wasn’t going to take no for an answer. 

_“I’ve been cold, standoffish, rude and completely unfriendly, but that doesn’t seem to slow this idiot down at all!”_

“What?!” was all she could think to say. His forwardness caught her off guard. 

“I asked for your name.” Sebastian said softer this time. 

He had been prepared to work for her attention but he didn’t expect to have to fight for it. Silence fell over them as they both looked at one another, brimming with anxiety. The feeling of rejection was settling in his stomach as he lowered his eyes to the ground. He stared unfocused at her tiny feet within tiny white sandals when he suddenly heard exactly what he wasn’t expecting. 

“It’s Cecilia.” 

Sebastian raised his head. 

“Huh?”

“My name... It’s Cecilia.” she repeated nervously looking down to the ground. She clutched her hands around the straps to her gym bag and let out a breath she didn’t mean to hold. 

“Cecilia.” Sebastian repeated. Her name felt like sugar on his tongue and he smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you guys think! Also, feel free to follow me on tumblr at BatDesu.tumblr.com!


	5. Chapter 5

The ice cream shop was bustling and a soft chatter filled the air. Exactly as Cecilia had worried it would be. She swallowed hard as her eyes darted around the small dining area dreading the moment she would meet eyes with with someone she knew. However the person she wanted to see possibly the least was Sebastian. She shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other as she stood next to him grimacing at the self-satisfied look on his face. He was like a dog: simple, bulky, and plain dumb. Cecilia imagined she would have been more of a cat person if she weren’t so allergic to them.

When the two of them reached the counter, Sebastian smiled and encouraged Cecilia to order.  
“Go ahead and get anything you want, Cecilia!” He said with a pleased smile, her name rolling off his tongue like syrup as he enunciated each syllable with glee. 

Her ears perked up at his offer.

“...Anything I want?” She challenged. 

“Of course! Anything!” he repeated. 

With a wicked gleam in her eye Cecilia looked up at the menu and ordered the biggest sundae available. Chocolate ice cream with syrups and sprinkles. Sebastian raised his eyebrows in surprise. He looked from her and then to the sundae being scooped up and couldn't fathom how  
such a tiny girl expected to pound back all of that ice cream. Cecilia peeked at his expression out of the corner of her eye. Upon seeing his obvious surprise she faked sympathy.

“Oh no! Did I order too much? I can pay for myself, don’t worry!” she offered with false sincerity in attempt to make this outing into anything but a date. Thinking she had won by clearly ordering outside of Sebastian’s budget she could only gape in disbelief as Sebastian ordered a sundae that matched hers in size. Red-brown eyes glinted back at her, meeting her challenge and possibly raising the stakes. Soft pink dusted the young girl’s cheeks in what she assumed was anxiety however she hadn’t ever met someone as crazy about sweets as she was. 

“Thank you,” Cecilia said quickly as she turned to leave with her sundae in hand. 

“Wait! Can’t we just talk?” Sebastian called after her. She rolled her eyes before turning back to face him. 

“About what?”

“...About what? I don’t know...you! I want to get to know you.” he said in defeat but then chuckled a bit before saying, “Besides, there is no way you can actually finish all that ice cream.” 

“Yes I can!” She blurted out. Her cheeks became redder than before. 

Sebastian only cocked an eyebrow and with a challenging smirk he gestured to a nearby bistro table with two chairs. Cecilia looked at Sebastian with contempt before pouting and sitting down, placing the sundae on the table. Her suitor sat down with a victorious sway and rested his chin in his hand. With a half lidded smug look on his face he waited for her to prove it. 

Defiance burned in Cecilia’s eyes as she maintained eye contact and scooped a heaping spoonful of ice cream. 

“Wait.” Sebastian began causing Cecilia to pause her first obstinate bite. She rolled her eyes and turned her gaze away in annoyance waiting for whatever stupid thing Sebastian had to say. 

“If you aren’t able to finish it...,” He paused as if nervous to complete the sentence, “... you have to stay and chat with me for awhile.” he gave a satisfied nod. Cecilia placed the spoon of ice cream into her mouth and pulled it back out with a pop, completely clean. 

With one eyebrow raised she gave him a challenging stare. 

“...and if I can finish it?” she asked in a smarmy tone while sticking her spoon back into her sundae collecting another heaping spoonful. The question had taken Sebastian by surprise. He was hoping they could just skip over that part. He was confident enough that she couldn’t possibly succeed anyways, so what was the point in adding in the alternative? He sat back in his chair and propped his foot upon his knee. 

A chuckle escaped his lips before he continued, “... _IF_ you can finish it...then you can leave.” Cecilia took this as a commencement to his trial and began eating her ice cream with haste. Silence befell the couple for a few awkward moments before Sebastian began to get nervous he was about to be made a fathead. In an attempt to slow her down he started spouting off questions as soon as he could think of one. He tried to sound calm instead of anxious like his heart was sounding. 

“...so… What’s your favorite color?” he asked. 

“Blue.” Cecilia replied flatly between bites of ice cream, not even so much as raising her eyes from her task.

“Favorite food?”

“Chocolate.” 

Sebastian felt dumb for that question as he recounted the number of chocolate toppings she had put on her chocolate ice cream. 

“...You like sweets a lot huh?” He questioned with a nervous chuckle seeing her bowl nearly half finished. 

“Yep.” She said blandly. 

“...Yeah? Me too!” Sebastian attempted but that information didn’t seem to interest her, “ I prefer strawberry myself, but I enjoy chocolate too.” he continued.

Cecilia’s gut started to squirm and she couldn’t tell if it was because of too much ice cream or guilt. Internally she couldn’t help but feel bad for being so cold to Sebastian. While he was sort of a creep he was just trying to be nice and get to know her, but getting to know her is exactly what _Ciel_ was trying to avoid. Her thoughts were interrupted suddenly by a sharp pain in her temples: a brain freeze. Her toes curled in her shoes and she squeezed her eyes shut trying to will the painful cold away. Sebastian suppressed a chuckle at the sight of her turned up expression. 

“Brain freeze?” He asked condescendingly, “You should slow down.”

Her pained grimace turned into an irritated glare. That guilty feeling was gone. With unbroken eye contact she ate another spoonful of ice cream nice and slowly as if to remind Sebastian she couldn’t care less what he has to say. He wasn’t sure why but he found her attitude and stubbornness adorable; adorable and obnoxious at the same time, but seeing her sensual and slow paced eating made him squirm in his seat a bit. Adjusting his legs, he put both feet on the floor deliberately and firmly. 

Cecilia’s sarcastic looks of delicious ecstasy were starting to annoy Sebastian. He couldn’t tell what her end-game was but he wasn’t ready to just let her go that easily. Maintaining eye contact he began to shovel ice cream into his mouth. 

Cecilia’s face changed from her satirical euphoria and into appalled shock. That _bastard_ was trying to get the one up on her. With new found determination, Cecilia found herself competitively troweling heaping spoonfuls of the frozen dessert into her mouth; Brain freeze be damned! It wasn’t even about getting home quickly anymore, this was about principle and there was no way she would let Sebastian win. 

Uneasiness flushed through him when he broke their staring contest to check her ice cream dish and finding that it was already mostly gone! A stinging pain shot up into his temples and he winced for only one moment before he resolutely willed it away. That pang of frozen agony was all the time it took for the girls dish to be finished and she triumphantly pulled her spoon from her mouth, leering at the man across from her. 

Sebastian could only stare, his mouth hanging open and spoon waiting at the edge of his lips. With all the elegance of a ballerina, Cecilia stood from the table and shook out her hair. While seduction was not her intention, but more humiliation, she leaned across the small bistro table and gently pulled Sebastian’s spoon to her mouth and took his bite. She stood upright and ran her tongue over her lips to collect any stray ice cream, gave her _date_ a deliberate smirk and then turned to walk out of the parlour. 

“Thanks for the ice cream, Sebastian.”

 

Sebastian found himself dazed, dumbfounded, and for some strange reason, more attracted to her than before. Dropping his spoon into the half-empty bowl, he rested his chin in his hand, elbow against the tabletop, and just watched her leave. The sway of her petite hips almost acted as a pendulum hypnotizing him. 

“You’re welcome,” he said softly but she was already gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow this took me forever to update. I got so busy with work stuff and health stuff! Sorry! I hope I'll be able to update more regularly now.
> 
> Also this chapter is kind of short! It just felt like it needed to end there though! Ill get onto chap 6 soon!


	6. Chapter 6

Cecilia sped down the sidewalk in the direction of the bus stop. She hadn’t even made it to the street corner before she heard a voice calling from behind her. Frozen, her stomach coiled and knotted itself and she could feel her skin become clammy. 

“Hey!” the voice said again. Having heard that sound more than enough for one day had left her on edge. She clenched her jaw in a fake smile and spun around to see Stupid Sebastian standing down the street in the middle of the stupid sidewalk, his two stupid arms in the air waving _stupidly_. Cecilia crossed her arms and cocked her hip out in a particularly unfriendly position. 

“What?” she shouted back. 

_Something something_ “again” _something something_ “out?”

“I can’t hear you!” she replied loudly to whatever it was Sebastian tried to say. He approached her in a light jog and coasted to a stop just in front of her. He stood upright, towering his six foot self over her own measly five feet.

“I said…I’d really like to see you again.” he repeated with a smile that Cecilia was sure worked on all the girls. How tragic that it should be wasted on _her_.

“Well, you don’t seem to have any trouble seeing me from across the hall.” the small girl teased with a chuckle. Sebastian didn’t find it all that funny but laughed with her nonetheless. 

“No, what I mean is. I’d like to take you out,” he clarified with a hopeful look. It was clear she didn’t want to talk to him, so why couldn’t he stop?!

“...out?” Cecilia repeated. Her heart began pounding harder, faster, louder, and she couldn’t take her eyes off of his. 

“...on a date,” Sebastian suggested, “ Maybe dinner?”

“...I…uh…” the girl stammered. Cecilia was speechless. _Ciel_ was distressed. 

“Okay! Is dinner too much? How about lunch then?” Sebastian offered quickly, almost rambling but trying to keep his cool. 

“Coffee?” 

“Okay okay, I’ll go!” she said desperately.

“The mall---Really?!”

“....Saturday. Twelve o’clock... Ice cream,” she declared and immediately turned to walk away. Her heart was thumping so hard she swore her vision was blurring with each beat. 

_What are you doing?! Idiot!!_

“It’s a date,” Sebastian affirmed sweetly and more mature. Both headed home, hearts hammering in their chests. Sebastian was glowing. Ciel felt like puking.

***

The cat colony, otherwise known as Sebastian’s babies, were very excited to see him home. He was later than usual, which of course meant they were _starving_. Tiny toes and tails scuttled around Sebastian’s feet as he made his way to the kitchen to feed them.

“Dramatic as ever, huh guys?” he teased as he laid down the bowls of food and watched them crowd in to eat. Loaf paced back and forth on the couch urging her owner to come and sit with her. She was less interested in food and more desperate for attention. As soon as Sebastian sat on the couch the fluffy cat walked right into his lap and put her paws on his chest in a kitty-hug. 

“Aww, hey there,” Sebastian hummed while stroking her puffy fur. A loud purr resonated from within her and it made him smile. If he could purr himself, he would have. 

“Guess what, Loaf,” he said cheerily. The cat made eye contact with him and gave a small meow-hum in response. If he didn’t know any better, Sebastian would think she really understood him. It didn’t matter though, he would talk to her anyways because it was better than talking to nobody and he didn’t want to jinx himself by telling Agni. Later for sure. After the date. 

“I asked her out!” 

Loaf looked at him in confusion and gave a slightly more audible meow, then adjusted her weight. She stood and made her way to turn around, stepping one of her tiny yet firm feet right onto an area Sebastian would have preferred her not to. He grimaced and lifted her immediately to relieve the pain and laughed. 

“You’re not jealous are you?” he teased the unaware cat. He flipped her up into his arms baby-stye and kissed her on the top of her head. Standing up, he made his way to his bedroom carrying the fluffy tabby close to him. 

“It would never work, you and I. We are too different!” he joked and plopped her onto his bed. Two other cats whom were on the bed asleep shifted groggily and resettled nearly undisturbed. Sebastian changed into more casual clothes. He wore a button up and slacks to work but it was definitely not his style at all. Once he was comfortable and had taken care of his daily chores of litter box maintenance, running laundry and taking care of any other messes the feline force may have made, he grabbed himself a beer from the fridge and sat on his back patio in the shade, using his cellphone and bluetooth speakers to play some music.

His yard was nice enough, not immaculate like his neighbor’s but he kept the grass mowed and the shrubbery watered. There was a flower bed along the edge of the yard and landscaped into the corner of the fence. It could have been beautiful if Sebastian had ever bothered to plant flowers in it. As it was, it was a raised stone wall with dirt and a small bush or shrub here and there. He could always hire Ronald to do it for him, but right now he almost preferred to leave it this way simply because it bothered Will so much. 

As if on cue Will poked his snobbish nose over the fence. 

“Would you mind turning off that racket?!” he snapped rudely while adjusting his glasses into place. 

“What!? That “racket” you’re talking about is a classic! You’re telling me you don’t like Led Zeppelin?” Sebastian argued.

“I don’t like noise. Turn off your _Bread Deception_ so I can relax in peace!” Will protested once more before turning to go back to his porch.

Sebastian snickered at “bread deception” and began to scroll through the music on his phone. 

“Alright, alright! No more **LED ZEPPELIN** ,” he corrected before selecting a different song. Heavy screaming and screeching guitar flooded the air, with the sound of drums being pounded so fast it almost didn’t sound intentional. The “music” was so loud it almost startled Sebastian, so he could only imagine the state of Will’s pants just then. 

“ **I will call the police!** ” Will shouted over the blaring horror called ‘death metal’. Sebastian’s cackling laughter could barely be heard over the cacophonous music. He wasn’t scared by Will’s bluff but decided he had heard enough whining for one day and tapped pause on his phone. He gathered his things and went inside, his laughter carried on the whole way. 

_Bread Deception_

***

_A thick red velvet curtain opens to reveal a glittering stage presenting a single ballerina. She glows with radiance and moves like silk across the wooden floor. A leap and a pirouette follow another leap as she makes her way to the opposite side of the stage. She feels a soft tug on her arm and gracefully spins to see the owner of the hand with the gentle hold on her. He pulls her toward him into a spin and lifts her high. She feels her body relax, completely trusting this mystery man. When she is back on the ground she continues to spin with him, each rotation trying to get a look at him, but he seems just as determined to keep himself unknown. He has dark hair and she catches a glimpse of auburn eyes. When he holds her close she can smell him and it’s so seductive. Has she smelled this before? When he twirls her away she begins to get a better look at his features. Her tutu springs up and down with each plie. Subtle arm movements accompany her footwork and seem to entice the ballerino who approaches in his own series of pirouettes. The two dance around each other in harmony all the while playing their game. Just as the Pas de Deux ends, her eyes meet his for a brief moment. His nose is straight and elegant. His eyes are severe and pierce into her very soul. There is a hitch in her breath for a moment, so she allows her weight to be supported by his skilled hands. His face is unique and she recognizes it from somewhere._

Ciel’s head springs up from where it had tipped over. Had he fallen asleep? He groggily looked around his room in confusion. A vibrating buzz against his nightstand sounds again and he realizes that it was what woke him in the first place. 

_A text message?_

With an unsteady hand he grabbed his phone and checked the time: 8:00pm. He had been asleep uncomfortably on his bed for hours. He realized then that he had been reading and let his book fall shut when he passed out, losing his place. With an exasperated sigh he looked to read the text on his phone screen. 

**“Hey there Peach!”**

And then,

**“Don’t ignore me!”**

Ciel looked at the texts a moment longer. They came from a number he didn’t recognize. His stomach dropped and he felt his breathing become a little more difficult to manage. Who was it?! He felt it in his bones that somehow Sebastian had gotten his number. Miss Sutcliff probably gave it to him. The idea made him grumpy but it didn’t matter now. He had to make a choice. 

_Option 1: Reply and let Sebastian think he has “Cecilia’s” number. He could always change his phone number later on if he had to._

_Option 2: Play dumb. Tell him he has the wrong number. No Cecilia here!_

_Option 3: Don’t reply at all._

While option 3 sounded the best and easiest to him, he also felt like eventually that would go south. At some point he would have to either confirm or deny the phone number. With shaking fingers he typed out the reply, “New phone. Who is this?” 

**“Ur favorite person in the world!”**

Ciel was instantly annoyed. He liked games normally but not when he was being teased. This however was a trap and he knew it. With mischief in his eyes he began to type out his reply. 

_You want to play games,huh? Then be prepared to lose._

“Robert Plant?! How did you get my number?” 

He waited anxiously for a reply. 

**“What? Who even is that?! It’s Alois u idiot!”**

The relief he felt was as if the softest feathers were gently caressing all of his skin. He exhaled sharply and laughed to himself at getting so worked up over nothing. 

“Oh! For heaven’s sake. You had me worried!” Ciel typed back slightly annoyed. 

**“I can’t believe I’m not ur favorite person ever!”**

Ciel rolled his eyes. “Did you need something?”

**“Ouch! Do I need a reason to text an old friend?”**

“I guess not.” 

Ciel stood up and rubbed his eyes. He hadn’t eaten dinner yet but that whole ordeal left him with no appetite. 

“So how did things with Lover Boi go?” 

There it was. The true reason for the messages. Nosy jerk. With a roll of his eyes Ciel began to type a sassy reply about how ‘he’s not my lover boy’ but then froze. 

_Saturday….Twelve-o-clock...Ice Cream._

He groaned audibly and mentally kicked himself for getting into this stupid mess in the first place. 

“I have to see him on Saturday.” Words he chose carefully. 

Almost instantly Ciel’s phone began to chime. He stared at the screen for a moment considering denying the call but against his better judgement he answered it. Before he could even say anything his ear was bulldozed by the voice of his friend. 

“You have a date on Saturday!?” Alois cheered loudly. Ciel began to reply but was interrupted by what he could only assume most girls go through at sixteen.

“Let me help you get ready! Eee! Stay the night with me tomorrow night! Please Ciel! Please let me dress you up!” 

The shrill excitement in Alois’ voice sounded more like _he_ had the date.

“Alois, I really don’t need---”

“Please Ciel! Pretty please!?”

To be honest, Ciel didn’t want the help. Not one bit, but getting dressed at Alois’ house allowed him to leave without having to distract Vincent or get ready in a public restroom. Begrudgingly he muttered, “Okay. I’ll ask my father.” 

“Great! Meet me at the mall at 7:00! That’s when I get off work,” the blond almost sang. 

“Are you sure your parents won’t mind?” Ciel asked nervously. 

“Are you kidding?! They will be delighted!”

“Okay…” Ciel bit his lip as he spoke. He hadn’t really thought about Alois’ parents. What will they think seeing Ciel come in and Cecilia go out? He tried to put it out of his mind. The Trancy’s seeing him was the safer alternative than his dad so he had to make it work. 

“See you tomorrow, Peach!” 

“Stop calling me that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While somewhat uneventful, this chapter is leading up to some pretty fun stuff so please stick it out with me! :) 
> 
> Also, don't know who Robert Plant is? Google it. ;)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading!
> 
> This is my first fan-fic so I would love to hear what you think!  
> Please leave a comment and let me know! 
> 
> Chapter two coming soon!


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